Peace for the Journey

It seems like forever ago... and yet, in a flash, the time is gone, the wait is over. The awaited, anticipated daughters are in your arms as I write this, and will soon be in your home. You will begin your new life of love together, and yet your heart journey began the moment you laid eyes on those deep chocolate eyes and curly little heads.

Your journey has not been without it's brokeness, bumps and bruises, in fact, it has been downright agonizing at times. At times I have cried out, "Lord, are you listening?" But through it all, you have remained... His peace has sustained you, above all else.




You will forever be an inspiration to those who travel similar roads and need uplifting. You've been there, done that, cried those tears, prayed those prayers and came through to the end. Which is really, just the beginning.

I can think of no better mother than you, Jules, who is so up for the challenge that awaits you. You will woo your new daughters and win their hearts and glory in the day when they say those words, "I love you, Mommy"

You have always loved my children as if they were your own and have taught me how to love them better. Children look good on you.

My family is so blessed to have been intertwined with yours for the years we have walked together. We have witnessed your lives, and have been left with your imprint.

We rejoice with you now and pray for many more years of love (and silliness!) between us.

~ christa jean

p.s. head over to AbFab to view more info on their adoption!

Drumroll Please!

And the winner is........

#5 ~ Amy from Allen Academy!!!! Yay! A fellow home schooler!

Congratulations, and thanks to all who played.

I'm sure I'll have more contests to come, that was too fun!

~ christa jean

Last day of contest!!!

If you haven't already, head on over to Darcy's place and leave a comment to be in the running for the prize.

She will announce the winner tonight!!!

Too fun!

~ christa jean

Feast of Love

My hot drummer husband has been gone for 7 of the last 10 days on business trips. I have been one sad and scatterbrained girl!

Last week I had planned out a special dinner for that guy to come into the house and smell and drool over. What man doesn't love a nicely marinated hunk of steak, some grilled asparagus with butter and lemon, and some crusty ciabatta bread?!!!

So, I go to pull the steak out of the freezer early in the day and, UH OH! I see that it has turned a greenish-brown. That does not look right... Great, now what do I do? I really could have rushed everyone off to the store, but for the fact that 2 of the 3 girls were asleep and I had been cleaning all morning.

I text my hubby to share my woeful story with him and this is what the dear man says to me:

"Seeing you will be dinner enough"

Oh My GOSHNESS. That gave my heart a jumpstart! I loved him up extra good that night ;-D But don't ask me what I made for dinner!

Now today my husband has returned from his second trip and I'm making good ol' homemade macaroni and cheese, a light salad, and a strawberry~rhubarb crisp. Simple, yet yummy, and made with love.

I feast on the love he gives to me. I am a better woman because of this man's tender care of me. I have want of nothing else.

My heart is full.

~christa jean

Goodbye it is!

What dork votes on her own poll? ME!!!
But I changed my vote and the majority speaks that they would rather have music be an option to be pleased by, if so opted for.

I really do like my music (of course, I'm biased) but I do turn off other's music when I'm jumping from blog to blog (mostly because I'm listening to my own, tee hee). So, it can be annoying when a song I don't particularly care for comes blaring at me, I'm more likely to just turn off my speakers.

Then again, I love when a blogger has a song that fits her post. That's what I often feel, that there is a special song for each weird thought in my head. My life is a musical. Hopefully not a tragedy... but a dramatic comedy as I learn to lighten up, release my burdens, enjoy who I am and the gifts which surround me.

That said, I probably will still change my tunes a bunch and if there is one song I reeeeeeeeeeeally want y'all to tickle your ears with, I'll let ya know! Sound alright?!

So, celebrate my quirky music style for one more day, if you would, and listen to today's ode to my music fading away.

~ christa jean

p.s. don't forget to join in the contest if you haven't already! it will end Friday evening.

Anyone up for a Contest?!!!

That special gal, Darcy, who designed this Beautious blog look for me (Graphically Designing), who also has her own blog (Life With My 3 Boybarians), who also homeschools 3 cute boys... whew! Well, she is holding a contest over at her blog and the prize is one of my jewelry pieces! Isn't she so shweet?!
Hop on over and comment to win.


This is what I'm giving away:


Mmmm, looks delicious!

~ christa jean

Scenes from the backyard

I let my girls have a romp around the backyard with our digital camera (eek!) and they totally surprised me with their photo saavy pictures!

Through their eyes...

~ christa jean

By His Grace, those wounds will not kill.

Somehow, that certain Someone always manages to have the perfect timing.
These words came to me at that apropos time...

Wounds Can Change Your Heart

"Living in a world broken by sin, we suffer wounds of many kinds. Perhaps the most painful are not the physical ones but those of the heart. No one has power to hurt us more deeply than somebody we love, somebody we counted on to understand and support us. But there are two ways to receive wounds. One leads to larger life. The other leads straight to death, that is to destruction--of those we influence as well as of ourselves.

By grace we can receive the wounds of our friends as our Master received them--in the strength and for the glory of our heavenly Father. Being sinners ourselves, however, we need to be brought low at the cross. Nothing will do this better than some piercing heart-wound, provided we seek Christ because of it and pray Him to purify us.

There is another way--the world's way. It is anger, resentment, retaliation, retreat into pride and self-justification. These are quite natural, and quite lethal. The choice is ours.

'The wound which is borne in God's way brings a change of heart too salutary to regret, but the hurt which is borne in the world's way brings death' (2 Cor 7:10 NEB)."
~Elisabeth Elliot, of course~

It would do me good to take this saying to heart also:

"Write your hurts in the sand, and your blessings in stone."

~christa jean

Music poll

I tried to change something on my music player last night, and it disappeared!
Well, I see it's back on now, but it made me ponder whether or not anyone but me actually listens to my bloggy music!

If you would, please vote on the sidebar or comment to let me know what you think.
Thanks!
~christa jean

Not a bird.

Remember when I tried my hand (literally!) at hammering copper? And I tried to make a bird and it looked nothing like a bird?

Well, I was starting to feel a little crazy last night and the perfect cure was to sit and make something. Here is what came of that:

I tried it on and it really looks fabulous... I am so tempted to keep it.

The copper "flourish" is a part of the clasp, so there are really 3 ways I can wear it. Flourish in the back, on the side, or as the focal point.

And these earrings match, kind of!

Aren't they so summery! Now, weather, COOPERATE!!!

Alright, I promised I wouldn't do this again, but here I am, taking pics of myself poorly.

Clasp in back. Clasp on side. Clasp in front.

~christa jean

Prairie Girls

When you get the call from a friend who says, "Hey, I have a huge flat of strawberries, wanna make some freezer jam with us?"

The answer, of course, must be "Yes!"

I have never made jam of any kind, nor have I ever attempted canning, but yesterday was really fun and I'm thinkin' I may like this! I know I am a pioneer girl at heart, I do make my own laundry soap, thanks to Tiff! Hold it now, I'm not trying to make myself sound better than I really am. No, I have never ground my own wheat to make bread, and I do my washin' in the washin' machine, thank you. Soooo, maybe I'm not much of a pioneer girl, but I like the thought of pretending I am, just a little. I do have long hair and like to wear flowy skirts (not denim jumpers!) and read Little House every day.

In true Little House fashion, my friend TLC and I got our kiddos together to whip up some strawberry jam. Only we cheated a little on the recipe, and, um, we didn't have bonnets on.

Wash those slugs off, literally.

Then mash em, smash em with a smile on your face!

Even boys like this part!

Aren't these little jars adorable?! Great for gifts.

Now, the best part, enjoying the fruits of your labor!

I just had to make scones today to er, uh, test and make sure the jam had set up well. I savored every bite.

Mmmm... I may have to go have another.

~christa jean

I awoke

I'm so glad I did from this dream. It was disturbing.

I dreamed I was walking through IKEA with a friend, when I went into premature labor. Luckily IKEA just happened to have a birthing tub.
I gave birth to 3 babies.
The first was not fully formed, it was about the size of the babe we lost in February, dead.
The second was deformed, with it's brain on the outside of it's skull, dead.
The third was small, with white goo coming out of it's eyes, but alive.
I took that third child out of the tub and cradled it, saying "Don't worry, you'll be okay".

I awoke.
I find that my dreams are often pictures of my fears.
But I know that was the Lord's voice in my dream, saying to me
"Don't worry, you'll be okay"

~christa jean

Father's Heart

Here is the honored daddy in our home, sportin' his new T-shirt with Pride!

In the eyes this mommy and these daughters, he is the best.

His thoughts toward these girls are thoughts of love and kindness.

He is patient. He teaches. He answers incessant questions. He wrassles. He tickles.

He makes me want to be a better person, wife, mommy.

He is sincere. He makes us laugh. A lot.

God choose well. And for that, I will be eternally grateful.

Today, on Father's Day, our Pastor spoke of those without fathers. Orphans.

Tears abounded as a video clip was played following an orphan girl in India for 2 minutes of her life. This little girl could not have been older than five and she was not in an orphanage. She was on the street. She carefully laid out her burlap sack on the ground and put her dirty pillow into place and lay down to sleep. Sorrow.

Joy. What was so exciting was the news that our church will be partnering with Pastor Wolfe and his ministry to orphanages in India. Nine hundred little cards were printed out in 10 dollar increments and by the end of service, they were all gone. Those $10 cards each represented a child to be taken care of. Also thrilling is the start of a Hope Fund for those who desire to adopt, but need financial help.

Maybe we too will adopt someday, but for now, we are quite fruitful in our ever-growing number of children, so we can help with our money.

I remember when I came back from the Dominican Republic years ago. I was so astounded the whole trip at how happy people were, even in poverty. But what really got me, down deep, was the last day when they wanted to bless our group and go out with us to a nice restaurant. That restaurant was Burger King. Most of them could not even afford to eat there. When I got home, I ran up to my room and cried. I determined to take only cold showers for a week to remind myself, in just a little way, of what I take for granted daily. I don't remember if I lasted the whole week, for how easy it is to slide back into American living. It felt gluttonous to me, back in the States.

Just the other day, I was in the shower trying to decide what to wear and complaining in my head that I didn't have any cute and new summer dresses. Oh, how I needed this reminder today, of what is the most important...

This is the essence of the gospel, true religion, to take care of widows and orphans in their need.
To think nothing of self, much of others.

I hope I don't need to be reminded again.

Give me your heart, Father!

~christa jean

Who is the pregnant one?

I was sitting on the couch, when hubby brought this in...

and it was not for me!

But this is what I've been having...

Yes, I see your jaw dropping, especially those who have known me to be a super anti-sugar freak and organic food junkie.

But the rules have changed now.

Mmmm, sugar.

~christa jean

Mother's Love, Friend's Love

My cousin sent this article to me a couple weeks ago and I thought it good enough to share with y'all! Click here to be transported, and if you're a mother, be happy to know that you are worth BIG bucks! According to the "Experts" ;-D

Don't worry, it's brief.

Thanks, Cuzn!

Today:

We, like friend S (bummer we didn't see ya!), picked a great day to tour the zoo. It was cold, the kids were extra-hyper and excited and it was a lot of walking for this tired momma. But it was a day full of fun! And friends. Friends are so theraputic... you don't even have to talk of "important" things, just being around someone who takes interest in your life, brings health and vitality.

Buds

How did they grow so darn fast?!

Joy was so excited about this excursion, she couldn't stop saying,

"We go choo choo train!"

A full day, a full heart. The kids are asleep and it's only 8:01. Wow!

~christa jean

PUT!

I love that word.
Webster's says: "to place in a specified position or relationship: LAY:
~ to send (as a weapon or missile) into or through something : THRUST... "

I especially appreciate the second meaning, thrust. For I came across this verse yesterday and will cling to it until I see the fruit I desire:

"You have put gladness in my heart,

More than in the season that their grain and wine increased.

I will both lie down in peace, and sleep;

For You alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety."

~Psalm 4:7-8~

I am asking of the Lord, no, crying out for Him to "thrust" joy into my very core.

I made a list a week ago of all the things I do as a mother that I truly despise. I was embarassed at how long my list was...

So, I purposed yesterday to try to change at least 2 of those bad habits.

Lord, by Your grace, help me to:

1. Speak kindly, not harshly
2. Smile into my children's eyes

I'm happy to say that overall, God did help me. Although, I am tempted to focus on where I still failed, I did do a couple of good things. I put together 8 puzzles with my oldest, and we cooked together. I made goofy faces with my middle goof and I snuggled with my youngest. By the end of the night they were oozing love for me and I wouldn't count it as my most successful day. I still didn't smile much and I raised my voice once. But maybe something in me began to soften, or maybe I just realized that while I must choose to receive, He must give. Put. Thrust.

I apologize for the heaviness of late. That's what happens when I give you a glimpse into my mind. In my mind there are battles raging. For some reason, at this time in my life, the war is fierce. But I look up at that verse again and know that I can lie down in peace and sleep.
He will keep me safe.

I like this: "I think that many of your troubles arise from an exaggerated anxiety, a secret impatience with your own faults; and this restlessness, when once it has got possession of your mind, is the cause of numberless trifling faults, which worry you, and go on adding to your burden until it becomes unbearable, I would have you honest in checking and correcting yourself, but at the same time patient under the consciousness of your frailty. Remember that Jesus our Lord loves to dwell within a quiet heart, and to come to those who are at peace with themselves; restlessness and anxiety hinder our seeing Him, even when He is beside us and speaking to us." ~PÈRE HYACINTHE BESSON ~

~christa jean

Yes, I've been busy!

Ahhhhhhh, weddings.
They are glorious to attend... but when you (and your children) are in them, they are kinda like a whirlwind that sucks you in and spits you out in a heap at the end.

The best part? Pamperation! Not sure that's a word, but, it'll do. The pampering fun started last Wednesday with my mom treating all the bridesmaids to manicures and pedicures. I haven't had a pedicure in waaaaaaaaay toooooooooo looooooong. It was wonderfully relaxing, especially after I turned off the massage chair that was pummeling my back to bits.

Blonde and Beautiful Sister. Her shirt even says "BRIDE" on it!

THE mom and other sis lovin' life. Even Nephy-poo is enjoying the action!

Hard to see me on the right, but I'm all smiles!

On Thursday, my lovely and generous mother again treated me and my sis (the two of us who are very white) to a "Venus Spa Tan" sorta like the Mystic Spray Tan only better. Supposedly.

The guy (why do guys work at tanning spas?) walked me through the steps, there were about 10, HELLO, and then left me to it. You must always keep your palms away from the spray, lest orangish-brown palms occur. You push the green button and grit your teeth because whatever man designed this revolutionary spa thought it might be funny for the spray to come out cold. It sprays your front, beeps, you pivot just slightly to the left on the red line and do an Egyptian pose (oh yeah, the song was running through me head, along with "this is so freakin' cold). Beeps again, pivot right, Egyptian pose. Beeps again, turn to the back, KEEP PALMS AWAY FROM SPRAY! Then the drying cycle commences, but it's not warm air by any means, oh no, that guy's still laughing. After drying , a moisturizer is sprayed on, then more drying. Whew, was I glad to get out of that stall of cold torture. But, then I look in the mirror and VOILA, I look tan! I chose the setting that gives you an instant bronzer, but then regretted it 'cause I looked kinda dirty and had to wash my face 3 times!

Friday, the day of, I got up too early thinking it was late and jumped in the shower because I still looked rather dirty. I just laughed and laughed at the bottoms of my feet which were dark brown. I attempted to dry my hair into an extra curly style, but later the wind whipped all the curls out while I was running around doing errands.

Running errands on the day of is not such a grand idea. I had to pick up my shoes from "Megen's Closet"(one of my favorite places to shop!), that was after buying 3 pairs and taking them back. I wanted to buy some sparkly hairspray for my girlies, that was $5.50 and didn't work when I tried it later. And lastly, I decided I should get some extra padding so my strapless dress wouldn't fall off, so ran over to Target quickly.

Quickly was the plan. I quickly bought a yummy pineapple-coconut smoothie and some popcorn to share with the girls and then quickly went to look at earrings as I still didn't have the perfect jewelry to wear. I quickly found the most perfect pearl stud earrings, and was thankful because they were the last pair. I quickly jetted around the store getting the other last minute items, and then... I heard the words... "Uh Oh, mommy, one fell out" "WHAT!" Oh, the dread, one of the pearls had magically, not on purpose, come loose and fallen out of the cart. I was seething in that aisle as I thought of how far I had come through the store and how hard it would be to retrace my steps. But retrace I did, 2 times, and I never did find that dumb pearl.

Oh well, all's well that ends well. It all came together beautifully in the end.

Our pastor spoke beautiful words about staying connected to Jesus together, for that is the only way to survive the difficulties that inevitably do come along. He also spoke of the forgiveness and redemptive power through Jesus we have to give to one another, because we will be faced with our spouses and our own weaknesses, flaws, and even sins. Good words to hear again and again.

The wedding party. I look like I'm trying out for Miss America in that pose.

I love ya, sis, and know that you will be in good hands because God's looking out for you. May you grow together in faith and love.

~christa jean

Hope does not disappoint!

An excerpt from my journal yesterday...

"There is such blackness in my heart.

I hide in myself
I show no love
I build up the walls
I nurse my wounds
~~but leave them open
~~so I can look at them again and again."

"For out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks."
~Luke 6:45~

What things come out of my mouth, reveal the attitudes of my heart.

Some days, I get so bogged down by the darkness. It's not just that we live in a world full of it, but that I can't escape it because it is walking around with me in my own shoes. Isn't there supposed to be a "new man" in me? I weary of trying to be that new creation... because I can't. Unless...

There is hope.

"Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us."
~Romans 5:5~

He came to reconcile me to this hope. He has become the Mediator for this vile soul.
The Multitude of Angels sang of Him at His birth:

"Glory to God in the highest,
And on earth peace, goodwill toward men!"
~Luke 2:14~

Five verses later, Luke says that Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart.

Maybe it all rests on a choice.

"Put on the garments that suit God's chosen people, his own, his beloved: compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience"
~Colossians 3:12~

"You must put on the new nature of God's creating."
~Ephesians 4:24~

"You have discarded the old nature with its deeds and have put on the new nature."
~Colossians 3:10~

"The clothes we wear are what people see. Only God can look on the heart. The outward signs are important. They reveal something of what is inside. If charity is there, it will become visible outwardly, but if you have no charitable feelings, you can still obey the command. Put it on as simply and consciously as you put on a coat. You choose it; you pick it up; you put it on. This is what you want to wear."
~my favorite quotable person, Elisabeth Elliot

What will I put on today?
fear, anger, bitterness, darkness?
or
love, peace, praise, humility, Christ.

Dear God, Help!

It is my choice. Will I leave my old clothes where they belong? In a heap to be burned?

Those are my old clothes
~~dirty, full of holes
They must be burned
In the fires of refining
The fire in His eyes
The fire of His love.

~christa jean

Etsy is Cool!

See that cute little button on the side there?

Well, your supposed to be able to click it and it takes you to my Etsy (rhymes with "Betsy") shop! Hmmm, not working yet.

But, don't fret! If you scroll down, you'll see a sampling of what's in my shop ~ just a little peek ~ you can click on those and they actually work! From there you just click on "shop" and you'll see it all. All 9 items that is. Apparently, my computer and Etsy don't get along very well and that's why you will only see 9 items for sale.
It takes F O R E V E R to load a new piece, like, a day, no kidding. I just said the word "like".
So, let's see, if I want to load 30 items, it will take me 21 more days to do so. And I still have to figure out what my policies are going to be... sheesh, really, I've never written a business practice policy before.
I will be featuring Free Shipping for a while though, and we'll see how that goes!
So, that's the scoop!

~ christa jean