Transforme

DIY: Hot Air Balloon Mobile

2012-02-06T16:52:00.000-08:00

Lately, I've had my eye on hot air balloons. There is something so whimsical and almost magical about them. They make me think of dreams come true.

Look! This one, you can buy for ONLY $1,875!

Or not. But it is stupendous, is it not?!

I.love.rainbows.

And that's that.

This is the mobile that peaked my interest at first.

I stood there in that posh little baby boutique and just stared at it.

I like to look at an item and try to figure out how I too could make the same thing.

I looked at it longingly. I looked at it lovingly.

I looked at it long enough to know that I could not make cute little hot air balloons that looked like that easily or cost effectively.

Sigh.

But, then I saw this hanging just a few feet away.

And, I had an idea.

"The Grinch had a wonderful, awful idea."

(Well, sometimes I can be a Grinch.)

I bought this picture hanging mobile right then and there.

You can find it on Amazon for a way better price than what I bought it for!

Wish I had thought of that!

My idea was to print out a template of a hot air balloon and use some fabulous papers to create my own fabulous mobile.

Here is a list of the supplies I used:

~ picture hanging mobile

~ any picture/template/vector of a hot air balloon, printed out for tracing purposes

~ pretty papers, paint chips, wall paper, etc. (I couldn't resist glitter paper)

~ paper letters

~ laminator with pages (optional, I wanted my paper to be sturdier)

~ exacto knife

Items not shown (oops!):

~ glue stick

~ small eye hook (for hanging mobile from ceiling)
~ some fishing line (to attach to eye hook if you want a lower hanging mobile)

I printed out my template in three different sizes, and began tracing and cutting. I glued papers together so that there would be interest on both sides.

I wanted to have my boys initials floating amongst the balloons also.

"E" for Eliot. "I" for Isaac.

And "Bb" for big brother, little brother. ;-D

I.love.laminators.

Seriously. I want to laminate everything.

Flying high!

My baby loves to stare up at this and that makes me happy.

This project was so very simple and inexpensive. I only paid for the picture hanging mobile.

I will honestly tell you that this project took me three days.

I know!

It's because I have five kiddos, y'all! one being a five month old! I don't have a lot of uninterrupted time. But it was still fun.

The great thing is, I can change it up whenever I want! There are so many options.

What about colorful paper airplanes? Or birdies? Or origami shapes? Or pom poms...

What would you hang from it?

~ christa jean ~

A Vintage Christmas

2011-12-25T21:19:00.000-08:00

Everyone needs a white Christmas tree. Just my opinion, really.

But, ain't it so cute?

The ironic thing is that we bought all of these old ornaments at a garage sale. A garage sale in Shelton. We didn't even live in Shelton, nor had ever entertained the notion that we might someday live here. We were visiting my in-laws and we just happen to like bargains. We spent probably $3 on the ornaments. I LOVE me a deal!

Sweet little handmade doll. Tacky plastic ornament. So cool.

Cute, and kinda kooky, little choo choo.

Vintage glass balls in apothecary jars. I like apothecary jars. A lot.
I finally got around to papering the back of my hutch. I found this damask paper in the dollar section of Target and I think it looks FABULOUS! Thanks to Colleen, my fellow bargain-lovin' friend, for the tip!

I like it so much, I may keep it up all year. Or, maybe just a loooooong time, 'cause it was a pain in the patookie (whatever that is) to put up.

Bling for the drawer.

Found these glass door knobs at Anthropologie for 10 bucks for the pair. Did I say I LOVE me a good deal?Happy Christmas!

~ christa jean ~

Much Afraid

2011-12-06T15:13:00.000-08:00

"There is no fear in love;

but perfect love casts out fear:

because fear has torment.

He that fears is not made perfect in love."

{1 John 4:18}

FEAR. That nasty beast.

I referred to it in My Birth Story ~ 2011. I do not like it. Rather, I despise it with a deep loathing. It can be as blatant as a sense of terror in the night, or it can masquerade as a "what if?" thought. It can come as an overwhelming sense of stress, or hide behide the mask of perfectionism. It can be anxious thoughts that you can't see past, or a feeling of dread or foreboding. Whichever form it chooses, it seeks to dominate.

Thankfully, there is One who is greater than fear. He despises our enemies even more than we do. In gentleness, He comes and reveals the things hidden in darkness, so that we may be free from those dark tyrants. The Holy Spirit holds the key to unlock the doors that open into the recesses of our minds. Those are the places that need the truth. He guides us into all truth, if we are willing.

Just over one year ago, I began to notice a strange fear in my dear Oli. She would get up to leave in the middle of a movie if she knew, or thought there might be any blood. She had made comments in the past about not ever wanting to have children. How sad this was to me. I didn't understand why. One day I asked her what was the reason? She said, because of the blood in childbirth. I began to ponder what may be the cause of this irrational fear. It began to really concern me. I didn't even pray about it, really, but God knew I needed an answer. In an instant, a picture, a memory, came to the forefront of my mind. I was taken back to a time in her life when we were having tests done on her. She needed bloodwork done, but because of her young age, the pediatrician wanted her strapped into a "papoose board" to avoid her thrashing legs as he drew four vials of blood.

I can still see in my mind's eye, the absolute terror in her eyes as she screamed. She didn't understand what was going on. Maybe she wondered why I wasn't helping her. That trauma opened the door to fear, as traumas usually do. The fear from that trauma was manifesting itself in her life as a fear of blood.

I knew what I needed to do. I needed to pray for her and rebuke that spirit of fear off of her in the mighty name of Jesus. Also, praying healing over the trauma in her memory. I spoke scripture over her, "For God did not give you a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind!" {2 Timothy 1:7} I helped her forgive the doctor for strapping her down. Even though she didn't really remember that, it had still affected her mind.

Do you believe prayer works?

Guess what happened? She began to get very interested in being a doctor. She bought her own first aid kit from the dollar store and carried it around with her at all times, adminstering bandages to any little scratch. She asked for a "doctor kit" for Christmas.

That fear of blood is totally gone now, thank You, Heavenly Father. She asks me all the time if we can adopt an orphan someday. I see now how the enemy of her soul wanted to pervert or even steal a gifting of hers. Maybe someday, she will be a doctor at an orphanage in a foreign country, giving of her life to those in need.

All because the truth was revealed.

~ christa jean

DECOR8!

2011-11-15T18:27:00.000-08:00

I would have to say that decorating is on my "top five" list of things I love.
That list would probably look something like this:

1. God
2. Husband
3. Family
4. Decorating
5. Baths

Hmm... there's no room for sushi in that list. Or friends. Or sushi with friends. Might have to tweak it a bit.

Anyhoo, here's a few more pics for ya! You could call this our "New House Tour."

{The Master Bedroom}

This mirror used to be gold, but I have a secret (or not so) love affair with spray paint and couldn't resist. I think the new dark teal colour is fabulous. Of course, the picture doesn't show the true colour. It looks black.

The bed. I guess I like throw pillows, because every chair and empty surface in my house has a pillow on it. The pillows on the bed are not complete yet. Mainly because I found what I thought to be a set of king sized shams at Ross. When I got them home, it was one sham. What a shame! I really like that sham! It was on clearance, so I called back at the store to try and locate the match. Nada. Tried another Ross nearby. Nada. Commenced searching online. Nada yet. But I will persist. I know it's kinda silly, but I just want one room to be finished! I did score on the shiny pillows in the foreground. I found two of those pretties at the GW for six bucks each. They still had the "Linens and Things" price tag on them. Can you believe they were marked at $39.99?

I've had my eye on these velvet shades at IKEA for a while now. Wasn't planning to buy orange. Wasn't about to pay thirty dollars for them either! But last visit to IKEA yielded great reward. We had a credit there and were able to get a few things. These shades had been clearanced down to $15! The orange ones wanted me to take them home, so, I snatched em right up.

This goofy fake palm tree has traveled from house to house with us. We shuffle it from room to room, hoping it will fit somewhere... but it may be time to say goodbye. Sniff.

The baby snuck into this photo. Love him!

This pillow is another score from the GW and, at first I thought it was UGLY. It kinda looks like someone's macrame' project from the 7o's. I tried to walk away, but I couldn't escape it. Now, in my room, it reminds me of the sun rising.

The seven year old (WHA?!) snuck into this photo. She is never far from the baby.

{The Living Room, Part 2}

My living room is slowly but surely feeling more put together. This arrangement is directly facing the front door. We painted the table and mirror to match. I had intended to hang that plastic chandelier in the girls room in our last house, but never did it. It had pink "crystals." I decided to unstring the pink crystals and spray paint them the same dark teal/peacock colour that I used in my room.

Dried hydrangeas from my Mom's yard. Glittery pumpkin from a sweet friend. I like bling!

A closer look. Again, the photo is not showing the true teal colour. Humpf!

Another sweet deal from IKEA... the rug. It was on clearance also, and for its size, it was a fabulous price. See the new pillows on the couch? They are actually a midnight blue and ONLY five bucks! I love deals! And pillows! We sold the blue swivel chairs and just threw some faux fur over some old wooden chairs from my grandparents. Not the most comfortable, but will do for now.

Pretty rug.

Another girlie snuck into my photo. This one has dimples! The silhouette in the background is my seven year old again. I love that she has stepped up and is now my dish washer!

I really debated about the rug because of this patterned loveseat. But after a day of doubting my creative eye, I decided I was gonna just go with it! Be bold! The colours are almost the same and the patterns complement each other. The pillow was made by my sweet sewing sis and I LOVE it! That mix of patterns is perfect, in my opinion. Pair a floral or organic pattern with stripes. It always looks good. In one of my design magazines recently, I read that every room should have one spot of black. Hmm... the black glitter pumpkin and my stripey pillow will do.

Thanks for joining me for another tour!

~christa jean

My Birth Story ~ 2011

2011-11-07T16:01:00.001-08:00

{Me, days before baby was born. can't you tell I was ready to be done?!}

I knew it was coming.

I was so tempted to hide out in my house and not come out until he was born. The comments of "That baby hasn't come YET?" were starting to get on my nerves. Or maybe it was that people had been saying I looked ready to pop for two months...

Then there was the week I was put on a modified bed rest because of all the pressure I had been feeling "down there." I was ready then, but had to wait another three weeks.

It began at 2:30 am on August 27th.. Six or more contractions right on top of each other hit me strong with no warning. I immediately called my midwife because she was forty minutes away and every minute counted, considering my last birth took less than three hours.

I got up and began cleaning. We had been so good about having the house picked up every night, dishes put away, laundry put away. We were prepared. But not that night. So, I was putting laundry away and straightening up the bathroom, etc. Hey, don't laugh! I like order. AND I was having company over.

I felt a sense of excitement. I felt like this birth was going to be beautiful and glorious. I remember pausing by my bedside table at one point as my eye caught this quote on my journal, "Joy comes in the morning." I smiled. We were naming our baby Isaac, which means "Laughter" for a reason.

My Doula lived just five minutes away so she arrived first and began preparations for my midwife. During all this, my contractions were still strong but had slowed waaaaay down. As in, every eight to ten minutes apart.

My midwife arrived and lugged all of her gear in, which is a lot. Did you know that a midwife can suture and adminster oxygen and run an IV? She was ready! After checking all my vitals, she began unpacking.

I remember the first moment that I began to fear. My contractions had gotten to be so far apart. The thought came, "This is taking too long." I began to compare to my previous birth which was so precipitous. I guess I had expected, albeit wrongly, that this would be another "bing, bang, boom, whoa baby!" birth. The thought, "This is taking too long." then turned turned into "Something must be wrong."

Now, if you knew how much fear I had battled with during this whole pregnancy and how many times I prayed and repented for each specific fear, you would maybe think that the fear shouldn't be an issue anymore. At least, that is what I thought. I know what fear does to your body, especially in a birth. Your muscles tense up and your body begins to fight the birthing process. Been there, done that and that is why I fought so hard early on so that I would not have to deal with the fear in the middle of the process.

There were days during this pregnancy when I almost went into anxiety attacks. Anxiety is not just a disorder or a physical thing to be treated with pills, it is a battle with thoughts in the mind. It is fear. Or, even more accurate, a "spirit of fear." Evil spirits are named for their character. First Timothy 1:7 states, "For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind." When the fear would come upon me, I would begin to fight, first by recognizing it, then taking responsibility and then repenting for letting it in and renouncing it. I have found that if I entertain a fearful/anxious/worrisome thought, that I begin to agree with it. We are commanded to do this: "... bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ..." {2 Corinthians 10:5} Fear is not trusting God. It is unbelief and ultimately a sin {Romans 21:8}. Sounds harsh, but for me who has been under fear's influence my whole life, I have to take a hard line against it.

Okay, back to my story!

I decided it was time to get into the birthing tub. I needed to relax my body. I wondered if the soothing, warm water would slow the labor down any more, but the opposite happened. My contractions began to speed up. Good, right? No. I began to dread each coming contraction and tense my body against them. And the fearful thoughts kept coming. Even as I began the pushing process, they were bombarding me. One said, "You're just gonna end up in the hospital anyway" another said, "The umbilical cord is going to be wrapped around his neck," yet another said, "You are failing." And the best one was, "I am NEVER doing this again!" Which is kinda funny. Doesn't every mom in the intense moment feel like this? But this thought was also based in fear because of the fear of pain. Can you believe that I was even worrying about whether or not we should have any more children? I have worried about what others would think of us if we did. Not saying we will... :-D

One of the best weapons against fear is the WORD. I finally felt the attack on my mind lift when I whispered, "Hide me in the shadow of Thy wings... " {Psalm 17:8}

At that point, I was near the end. I reached down to feel his fuzzy head. There he was. Finally! We brought him out of the water and he wouldn't breathe. Literally, for what felt like forever we were trying to get him to take his first breath. It was really only a minute, but he was being so stubborn with his little lips all pursed shut.

All went smoothly from there, but for an intense struggle I had with myself later in the day. I really felt like I had failed at being strong. I began to join my voice with my Accuser's and believe it. I had let the fear back in and was not able to overcome it until the very end. The attack had been too strong.

When I think back to those fearing thoughts that were bombarding me, they sound so ludicrous. But in my weakness, they came in and got a hold on me. The enemy had planned to steal my joy and almost succeeded. It wasn't til a week later at a check-up with my midwife that I realized how wonderful my birth had been (aside from the mind wars). From start to finish, it was only four hours! My midwife informed me that the bag of waters had never broken and so, when baby came out, she had to break it from around his head. This was a rare thing she said, and made for such a gentle entry for baby. Gee, that was so nice of me to do that for him. Hahaha.

I am so thankful that I am being perfected in His love because, "... perfect love casts out all fear..." {1 John 4:18}

{Welcome Baby Isaac!}

{Newborn}
{One Month}

{Two Months, swimming in a sea of fur}

{Such sweet cheeks!}

{Tiny baby hands} {That he is with the signature Cheston baby chin}

{Crazy action shot with brother}

{Lovin' this!}

~ christa jean

Long time, no see!

2011-10-06T23:05:00.000-07:00

I've been putting off posting for a while now, not because I don't have anything to say, quite the contrary! I have TOO much to say and TOO little blogging time.

Since my last post, I had a baby. Yay me! Hence, the other reason I've been procrastinating. I wanted my first post back to be his birth story, but, alas, every time I think about sitting down to pen it, I get lost in thought about it all. I am still processing the whole experience.

So, as I drag my feet on that, let me just give you some photos to browse.

Here is the newest little man, born at... honestly, I don't remember what time, on August 27th (four days after my birthday, what a treat!). He was 8lbs, 13oz. and had a big noggin!

Welcome Baby Isaac!

They come out of the womb with such razor sharp little nails! Poor little face! But pretty blue eyes. Hope they stay that way!

Baby Bros. Big brother is very protective of him, but tries to pick him up when I'm not looking. So, I look.

Here he is, chillin' to tunes on Gracie's keyboard.

Now we come to some randomness. I look at these photos and chuckle. This is what you do when you are SOOOO done being pregnant. You paint random objects about the house. At least, that's what I did.

We found this chair at the GW years ago. I thought it might need a little "livening up."

This is the color I was gonna paint in our master bedroom. Decided to try it on a chair instead.

I don't much love the finished product, although, I think it's unique and even a bit whimsical. I have a pearlescent glaze I may paint over the aqua... not sure yet.

This cute towel stand was originally black (drat that I forgot to take a "before" shot!). I like it much better white. And I *heart* spray paint! It makes me happy.

I used these pom poms at a baby shower and then decided they would be super cute in my girls room. Makes the ugly ceiling light almost unnoticeable. Fist pump!

My youngest two girls sleep on the bunks. They each got to choose their own comforters from, can you guess? IKEA, of course.

This is my oldest's sweet bed. Can you tell that the walls are pink? I chose a pink that almost looks white. Love it! Still pondering what to put on the bare walls.

We finally got our "gallery" started in the hallway. Still waiting on the boy's photos.

Here is another paint project that I neglected to take "before" pics of. It was black, much cuter as white now.

Pour me some cold milk and give me a brownie. Perfection!

We bought this island at IKEA as well. The front is super cute, with lots of white drawers that, now, I'll have to take a photo of.

Here's my Hunka Hunka Husband attaching the top of the bar. I love him to bits.

I think I'm gonna paint the barstools something unexpected. Maybe cobalt blue.

The finished product!

This is me, right before baby was born, very large and too tired to put make-up on.

I am trying to model this new hairstyle that my sis showed me. My husband said I look like Pocahontas from the 70's. Not sure if that's a compliment?

This hairstyle is super easy. Just pop an elastic head band on top of your partially dry hair, all hippie like, then begin twisting portions and tucking them into the band, pulling them down under. It's best to twist away from your face. Wrap all the way down to the back and let dry. I braided the rest of my hair so that it would have that twisted look also.

The back looks like this! It's even cute enough as is to go out in public.

Couldn't get a great shot of the finished result (you know, the old "taking pictures of myself again" routine), but trust me when I say, it's an easy do that gives you flirty waves!

And that's that for now.

Be back soon!

~christa jean

SOZO

2011-08-24T16:23:00.000-07:00

There is a mystery in childbearing that I have yet to fully understand.

You'd think that because I am preparing to give birth to my fifth child, I would be an "expert" by now, but tis not the case.

With each new birth, there is a part of my spirit that is opened just a little bit more to "see" and grasp what this mystery truly means.

We were singing the above song a few weeks back and the chorus lyrics, which I've sung many a time, took on a new meaning.

"I am alive, 'cause You are alive.
Jesus, Your presence is changing my life.
I'm saved by the power of Your life in mine,
I'm saved by the power of Your life in mine."

Trying to wrap my mind around the fact that I have another little life growing inside of me, is like trying to wrap my mind around the fact that I have Jesus' life growing inside of me.

I have Christ in me and it gives me hope.

"To whom God would make known what is the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles; which is Christ in you, the hope of glory." {Col. 1:27}

To some this is foolishness. I admit it to be almost unexplainable, and isn't that just like a mystery, which often is only understood by revelation? It takes a child-like faith that says, "Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief!" {Mark 9:24}

In 1 Timothy 2:15, it says, "Notwithstanding, she shall be saved in childbearing..." When you actually look up that Greek word for "saved", you find that it denotes much more than an eternal salvation. "Sozo: to save, keep safe and sound, rescue from danger or destruction, to preserve, to make well, to restore, to heal, to be made whole."

"To be made whole."

This phrase is dear to me. I am being made whole. Daily!

Don't ask me to explain how giving birth will make me whole, because it is a mystery. All I know is that I need it, I crave it, I long for it.

It is the hope of this life. To be completed by the One who is perfect in love.
He takes all my sins, flaws, fears, and He restores, renews, heals.

~christa jean

Wishies

2011-08-13T14:40:00.000-07:00

Here is some more progress to report. We finally have the mirrors (remember when I found these bad boys for 5 bucks each?!) and light hung in our dining room. I have plans to paint this room still and I've decided to make it a bit dramatic! We've kept the wall color schemes quite neutral in this house. That way, I can add in pops of color with accessories and such. But, I say! (in me best British accent), have some fun with at least one room!

In this room, I aim to paint an almost a mermaid/emerald green on the top 3/4 of the walls and then add a board and batten molding look (inspired by Thrifty Decor Chick) to the bottom. My hubby even suggested painting the ceiling in the same green, only making it super glossy. He's got classy taste and we usually decorate well together, except, uhhhh, when we don't.

I am loving this IKEA light (always looks like a big dandelion wishie to me) that I've seen sooo many places and it's probably "so last season", but I don't care. It brings a sense of whimsy to this space that works well with the formal look of the crystal and mirrors. Oh, and by the way, I found those lamps in our local Re-Store, BEFORE they were even priced and placed for sale. Yup, I go snooping sometimes.

Okay, I wasn't really scrounging around in their store room. I just happened to be walking by and caught a glimpse and asked how much they would be. The nice sales man told me 9 dollars a piece. I said, "SOLD!" and promptly bought them. This was before I had a house or even had an idea what to do with them. The shades date them, unfortunately, so I'm keeping an eye out for some replacements.

I had plans to paint a design on the green in this room to make it look wall papered, but now I'm re-thinking that plan. Do you see why? The light makes shadows dance all over the walls. It is so fun! One day they are snowflakes, another day flowers. Today, I overheard the shadows referred to as large spiders. Ewww. My little guy calls them "fans" (he's obsessed with fans).

Anyhoo, here is my life in stages, friends.

~christa jean

The Rock Show Is Now Open!

2011-08-08T16:06:00.000-07:00

I think one of the most important jobs as a parent is to help our children learn what it is they were meant for. They each have such unique giftings, skills, and interests. It is a privilege to help them see the beauty in this.

So, when your almost nine year old wants to hold her own "Rock Show" with a friend, you have a choice, to view this as a bother (one more thing to clean up, ya know) or let her flourish in her interest.

Choice number 2 is best!

Here are some highlights from the "show"...

She saved up some bucks and bought herself this book she had seen. She especially wanted a book that would tell her what part of the world certain rocks and minerals were from.

Just in case you couldn't see where the obsidian is, she drew arrows.

The masters of the show, in matching shirts even.

Let your family flourish and thrive!

~christa jean

Time Flies

2011-07-26T16:31:00.000-07:00

{Pic borrowed from KK's blog}

It was a lazy day, not the kind when one is lazily enjoying the company of family, but the kind of laziness that kept me from doing anything interactive at all. My dishes were everywhere, my house was a disaster (yard sale consequences), and my kiddos were left to their own devices.

I was lost in blog land, for hours it seemed. And then I got to one blog written by a single mother (not single by choice) of four boys. She wrote about how she has to work five jobs to stay in her house and how she worries for her boys. She spoke of the strain she sees of divorce on her children. She voiced her hurt. She also lovingly described the ways she stops everything she's doing when she is home with them and looks them each in the face, and reads stories, prays with them, and tickles them. Because time flies and she didn't want to miss their childhood.

That's when I left my computer.

I don't want to be near my children in body, but never engaging their hearts.

I joined my little people outside and in my haste to be with them, locked us out of the house.

Now, hubby was gone helping a family member with a house project, and that left me, outside with no cell phone. I knew he would be home in about an hour, so I thought we'd just sit in the shade and enjoy it.

It's amazing how attitude can make or break an opportunity like that. When I first told my kids we were locked out, one said "Oh no, now we'll never get in!" Isn't that just like us? To see the negative first? Another one said, "But we'll be bored out here!" Really? It seems to me that we were given imaginations for a reason. Yet another one said, "If you guys would have just checked the door knob before you closed the door... " Shift the blame onto someone else, that's the way it's done.

Okay, that last one was me.

At that moment, I had a choice: to admit it was my doing and change the attitude atmosphere, or to keep the scowl on.

Thankfully, I chose wisely and admitted it was my fault we were locked out. And changed my tactic to, hey, let's be together!

I turned the sprinkler on and let them at it with their clothing on. That changed everything. I could have been further tempted to scowl when I realized that my little guy had done his "dooty" in his diaper. Literally, the flies were swarming around him, folks. But, again, I decided to relax because I couldn't change a darn-tootin thing at that moment.

When I ponder how quickly time is flying by, it gives me pause. I think about how I can only remember small fragments from even when my little guy was a babe. That was only 2.5 years ago! How my firstborn looked as a baby, I seem to recall only in the photos I see of her.

So, my prayer is that I would learn this lesson early and learn it well. And even in the harried moments, remember...

Babies don't keep.

~christa jean

Transforme

2011-07-07T21:35:00.000-07:00

We have lived in our new house now for just over a month. In that span of time I've unloaded millions of boxes (more like 160 or something), while filling up more boxes for a G-sale. I've found that I kept too much stuff. Time to simplify!

I've also painted four rooms (with help!), ironed seven sets of curtains, organized (and re-organized) twenty kitchen drawers.

I have probably had a dozen meltdowns, mainly because, my house is in process.

Seems to be a sloooooow process.
Isn't that just like us? We are being changed from "glory to glory", only, I seem to be so impatient. I want it done NOW!

Take a tour with me through some of our house "process" and help me say "NO" to perfectionism.
Sweet little hutch we found on Craigslist. With my dishes here, I have more room for food in the kitchen! I have plans to paint the backdrop behind the dishes to make them pop. Gee, maybe that will happen by December.

This is the wall directly facing the front door. It's all jumbled right now, but once the mirror is hung, it will feel more put together. I'm thinkin' I will paint that table a funky color, like coral!

This is probably the first thing you see when you enter the house. I LOVE it, but haven't quite figured out how to arrange all the "tchotkes" or "neeners" or "knick knacks", whatevah you call 'em. I like that this gives the illusion of an entry way so that we don't just walk into the living room furniture.

Aaaannnnnd, then, there is the other area that you see when you walk through the door. These are the "last stand" of boxes. They were all hiding in the office/guest room/drum room, but we painted that room over the weekend and decided to put them right where I would pull my hair out every time I walked by. It's been working! The pile is half that now and, hey, I still have my hair.

I am fond of quaint conversation nooks. This is directly behind the cube shelf in our faux entry way. The fur is only temporary. I just draped them over the chairs because, dagnabit! I'm tired of them. They remind me of denim blue. If they don't sell on Craigs, they are going in the G-sale!

Not sure what to do with this corner and the beautiful antique, albeit, sad looking rocking chair. I soooooo wanna re-upholster it! But, I DO NOT want to attempt it on my own. I have some fabric I already like, if I could just find someone to do it for me, for, say $100. That would be stellar!

This funky little love seat was scored down in OR at the G.W. for a whopping 10 bucks! Not the most comfortable seat, but sassy all the same.

The lighting is off in this pic, but as you can see I have more blue "denim" in my living room than is acceptable. Although, I do still love the bones on this couch. I aim to keep it for as long as I can and just keep adding different pillows when the mood hits me. Hey, when the pillows are only 5 bucks (the blue ones), I think I can handle that!

Again, stinky lighting, but I'm trying to show you the panel curtains (which are only partly done) from IKEA.

Oh, so sweet garden stool, where to put you?!

I didn't take a picture of the whole living room because there were books and boxes still around. Drat, perfectionism! I loathe thee! But, you would be proud of me, I've actually had quite a few guests over, even in what feels to me to be barely organized chaos. That's progress, people!

Vintage inspired canisters that were super cheap at Tuesday Morning. I adore the crystalline blue soap that I found at fancy WINCO.

I think I like birds. They tend to pop up here and there in my house.

Hubby talked me into the curved shower curtain rods and I really love the look. They give you more arm room too! Towels scored on clearance at Tarjay.

And then there's me... trying so hard to figure out where to look that my eyes are going buggy and my smile is forced. Ah well, THIS is how big I am.

I'm supposed to just get bigger they say.

Two more months.

Now, if I could just get the baby room done!

~ christa jean

Trendsetter

2011-07-01T15:20:00.000-07:00

Here is my crafty sister, looking stunning in one of her new creations! I haven't figured out if I'm daring enough to pull off this retro look, but I'm workin' up to it slowly.

My Gracefull Girl got to be a model too, though the sun was making her eyes water.

Ya gotta love those naturally red lips. She will never have to wear lipstick. I'm just slightly green with envy. ;-D

Then there's the other blue eyed sis. All ravishing, I tell ya!

Click the red etsy button to your right to catch a glimpse of the other colors.

Happy Creating!

~christa jean

A Few of My Favourite Things...

2011-05-29T14:43:00.000-07:00

I always love reading posts that list the authors favourite products, I usually end up adding a few to my list! So, here is my own list, in no way exhaustive (in fact, I've already thought of more but it's harder to add the pics now) and I'm sure I'll have five more items come to mind while I'm trying to sleep tonight.

This lip shimmer is my go-to for summer. I like to keep one in my purse, one in my bathroom and one in my car cause I'm always smearing more on. It's looks especially nice when I'm tan. But, who am I kidding? I'm usually sunburned and freckled! Even so, I still put it on and pretend that I'm tan. Want an easy "how-to" on making your own lip colour? Pop over to my sister's blog for inspiration.

As I stated above, I don't tan easily, so I give my face a little help. I use this bronzer daily, sometimes I don't even put eye make-up on, I just swirl a little fake tan, do up my brows, glide on the lip shimmer and call it good. I'll take any ol' bronzer, really, this brand just happened to be given to me.
Ooh la la, this shampoo is for those of you who, like me, don't like to spritz on perfume. I would much rather wear a lotion or have a yummy smelling shampoo. I like to use this on my little girl's locks also, and then when they run by, the scent wafts and lingers. It is very floral, just to warn you. I know some can not stand perfume. Take a big whiff of it next time you're at the store and tell me if you like it!

I splurged on this lotion two years ago with some birthday money and I still have half a tube. Amazingly, it hasn't dried up or lost it's pretty scent. I still have it, partly because I love it so much that I don't want it to be gone, and partly because I don't want to spend that much on handcreme again. But, then again, I think this one is oh. so. worth. it.

This may sound weird to some, but I use coconut oil on my face all the time. I do it at night after I've washed my face and I let it soak in all night long. I love it and it's super natural. I'm not sure how one with a more oily complexion would like it, but it doesn't hurt to try!

I use coconut oil in my cooking also. No, I don't dip into the same tub for smearing on my face as I do to cook with! I use a different brand for cooking that I can't remember the name of right now. Have you ever scrambled eggs with coconut oil? The light flavor it adds is delish!

I don't get lattes very often, they make me kind of jittery, but boy, when I tried a "Cupcake Latte'", I knew I'd be back for another! I convinced a friend of mine, who kindly makes me a latte when I visit, to buy this flavor and now it's their favourite too. Tastes like cake batter. I LOOOOOVE cake batter flavor. Shhh, don't tell my mom that I used to mix up a box of yellow cake batter and not bake a cake. Yep, I just licked the bowl. But, I learnt me a lesson the day that I got a stomach ache.

On the six days of the week that I don't get a latte, I'm a good girl and I drink me some Pregnancy Tea. I like the hint of licorice flavor that comes at the end.

Now for some household items...

When I light up this sweet thang, it smells like I've been cleaning all day. It is lemon-y fresh and makes me smile and have a happy face!

I know this light has been around for a season or two, but I thought it would look super cute in the girl's bedroom. Will post pics when their room is complete!

I have loved this colour since I laid eyes on it. This pic doesn't show it in all it's glory. It really is a lot more green, exactly like it's name, "Sea Glass". I painted a few squares on my bedroom wall to see if I wanted to be immersed in it everyday. So far, I wake up and say, "Oh, I love that colour!" then at night, change my mind.

Now, I am thinking of using a lighter grey like the one below. Then I could add in any bright colored accesories, like pillows, curtains, etc.

Decisions, decisions.

What do you think?

Well, there ya go! I forgot to add in things like sushi and strawberry sour punch straws, but oh well. Hmm, now I'm hungry... talk later.

~christa jean

A Milestone.

2011-05-20T11:13:00.001-07:00

We celebrated the five year mark with this bundle of Joy this week.

The crown stayed on all day, and the next day, and the next...She requested ice cream cone cupcakes, same as last year. Although, last year I cheated and shoved store bought cupcakes in the tops of the cones. This time, I actually baked them (do follow the instructions when they say only fill 3/4 way full if you don't want them to volcano all over the sides), with a hidden surprise in the bottom. Only, the hidden surprise melted into a chunk of goo at the bottom of the cone. Oh well, it was still tasty! Nerds were the choice of topping, with strawberry frosting, lemon cake and colored cones. So demanding, I tell ya!

The other request was Chuck E. Cheese. Not my favourite past time, nevertheless, we went on a night that was not busy and had a lovely time with cousins and friends.

Sweets for the sweet!

Happy Birthday Joy Sprinkles!

~christa jean

MUST. BE. CREATIVE!

2011-05-08T14:30:00.000-07:00

{Be prepared to be bombarded with photos}
It flows from deep within, this desire to design, create, craft, decorate, transform and all other such suitable words.

What do I do when I don't have my own house to be creative in? I use my gifts elsewhere!
I helped create/update the decor in our church for this spring season.

IKEA always comes through for me. The tulip panel set is from there and the purple panels (only 5 bucks each!) we made into lighted panels. Took some ingenuity and hubby help to rig 'em up, but I'm pleased with the result!

These next few pics are from the ladies restroom.

This verse was quite a challenge to paint because the only place I could fit the projector (yes, I like to do things the easy way) was at an angle to this wall. It was quite tricky to make the curves line up.

I borrowed this idea from another church. I love that you see this little sign as you are walking out the door and it is so matter-of-fact. You ARE beautiful. Really.

Little details make all the difference. And I love fake orchids that do not die. I think I've killed 10 in the almost 12 years I've been married. Finally, my hubby got a clue and stopped buying them for me. He's the one with the green thumb, not I.

Do you recall these pretty little birdies? I said I would show you what they looked like on the wall, well, that was over a year ago. So, here ya go.

The next couple of pics are from a gal pals house.

She scored on a used couch and then re-decorated her room around it.

The lovely, funky couch! I got excited about it too and "helped" just a little. I found those pillows for her at Ross on clearance for $5.49 a piece! And, if you look really closely, you'll see a lego guy lying there. She homeschools five boys, people!

The lamps were another one of my "helps". I suggested that, because the couch sits so low, she give the illusion of some height and put lamps behind the couch. Cool lamps are not cheap, once you include buying the shades. I found these lamps for $2 a piece. Read, TWO DOLLARS! They were ugly brass, with even uglier shades, but I saw the potential. I used Krylon's "Fusion" spray paint which will adhere to anything, even plastic. Then I searched for shades. The ones I wanted were $15 at Target and I just couldn't bring myself to do it, not after spending $2 per lamp. The lamps sat at my friends house for a few weeks with no shades, poor girl. But then, HOORAY! We found shades at Ross for $6.99 each. She also put up some pretty white sheer panels and it looks FAB!

Before I sound too much like a decorating diva, let me just give you (and my blushing self) a piece of advice... always check a lamp out before you buy it at a thrift store. In my excitement, I left the store without even plugging them in. When I finally did plug them in, it was at my friend's house. And, OH, the aggravation I felt as I realized that the switches didn't work. Or work well. Now the only way she can turn them on is to plug them in each time.

Oh well, I laugh at myself!

This is me beaming because I actually made asparagus without overcooking it and it getting all mushy-nasty! And it was sooooo easy! I just melted a couple tablespoons each of butter and olive oil together in a big saucepan. Trimmed some of the woody stems off the ends of the asparagus spears. Threw the spears in to sizzle. I quickly and finely chopped some garlic in-between turning the asparagus. That's really the trick I found, don't cook them longer than say 7 minutes and turn them a lot. I added the garlic in after about 5 minutes, if you add them at the end and turn down the heat, they won't burn. I then sprinkled them with freshly ground pepper and "Real Salt" (the only kind of salt I buy) and voila! Perfecto! I also found that buying the skinny, baby looking asparagus makes them taste nicer. Maybe the huge ones are too far grown? Who knows.

Silly me, I had to take a picture of my salad also. It was so pretty. And so yummy. This recipe is from my girl Tiffany, who passed it on to me years ago and it's my go-to salad for every special event. It has a homemade poppy-seed dressing that I love.

My oldest daughter is quite crafty herself. She has been writing her own "recipes" for a few months now. Here is one of her concoctions that she made for me one sunny afternoon. Mango cubes with drizzled honey and sprinkles.

Note to self: make sure she washes her honey fingers before touching every cupboard and doorknob in the house.

I leave you with this pic of my "Kung Fu China Dolls"

It happens to be a perfect candid of what I see most days. Someone frowning at some injustice done by another sister. What the issue was, I don't even remember. But it was a big deal in the moment and I caught it on film!

Happy creating!

~ christa jean

DWELL.

2011-04-25T14:55:00.001-07:00

If I could list the number of houses that I've set my heart on since moving to Washington, it would be kinda funny. It's not an exorbitant amount, but it is an indicator of how fickle a heart can be.

There was that one house. A house right on the Puget Sound, with land and a chicken coop and a guest house. It was offered to us as a rental, but we were resisting the thought of renting for a short time and then having to move again when we found a more permanent place to abide (who likes to move their stuff and then move it all again?). That home passed us by.

The Victorian was, so I thought, the one for us. It was nestled right in downtown but still had some land. It had a brook running through one corner, a HUGE garden, a tree house, a shop, a green house, an attached guest cottage, and a chicken coop replete with chickens (do you sense a theme here?). But, alas. That house was out of our price range. Then there was the house that was on 2+ acres. It also had a bubbling brook running through the property. My heart leapt at the first sight of this property. I remembered all my fondest childhood memories of wading in the creek by our house, looking for crawdads and dreaming I was Diana, Anne's bosom buddy. All my dreams for owning land seemed to be coming to fruition in this piece of property.

The bridge over the brook. So Anne-of-Green-Gables-esque.
Views of farmland.

Cross over the brook and take a jaunt up to the barn.
The big barn with the chicken coop.

And here we go strolling back down to the house.

The house that was 3,700 square feet, people!

That didn't include two other outbuildings.

And then... the horror. When we walked through the house, we saw room after room that didn't make any sense. And some rooms undone. And three hallways in a row. What were they smoking?!

Even if we had been able to get the house for, say $100,000 (it was a foreclosure), we would have had to sink another huge chunk of time and money into re-modeling it. Which, on a sunny day, sounds like a fun idea. Seriously. We love to take the old and make it new.

But, if you'll remember with me, we have a baby due end of August. And four other munchkins who need to be loved and homeschooled. And then the remodeling idea doesn't sound so grand to me. Not at this time in my life.

Oh, how the wait has felt endless. Just when I thought I'd gotten to be pretty good at being patient, I find that I have a looooooooong way to go. Just when I thought the waiting was unbearable, I'd have to wait some more.

Yet, the promise still remained.

{The view off the front porch}

Then there was the house that we actually put an offer on. It was in a stellar neighborhood, had a circular driveway, two acres, and lovely arches inside.

The offer was refused.

And so, we waited more.

The ironic thing is that, somewhere in the middle of our wanderings, probably six to eight months ago, we were offered a house. The owners happen to be friends and they had bought it one year ago to fix up and sell. We walked through the house when it was just newly sheetrocked (is that even a word?) and thought it was cute and quaint, but too small a lot for us. And it was on a corner. With neighbors (gasp!) nearby. No chicken coop. No land with a brook to wade in. No space to roam and enjoy the quiet life.

So, we dismissed it.

A few months later, they asked us about it again and wondered if we would pray about it, because they had had us in mind when they bought it. We smiled and nodded, thinking "It was nice of you to think of us, but... we have bigger dreams to follow."

Shortly after that, I was soaking in the tub one night. That seems to be a place where I can clear my mind, and often, I am able to listen to that still, small voice. That still, small voice left an impression in my heart that we were to "take the Turner house". What? I must've heard wrong. But the impression wouldn't leave me. I also felt that I needed to hide that word in my heart and not say anything to my hubby, for the Lord would take care of his heart. But, I shared it with Carter (he pried it out of me!) and unfortunately, I missed the timing. He, well, let's just say, he had his eye on a bigger fish.

Then, time passed, and we put the offer on the house I mentioned before, the bigger fish.

The day the offer was refused, I suggested we take one more look at the Turner house (I call it that because it's on Turner Street). He agreed. That night we ran into the owner and in the course of conversation let him know that the other house we had been pursuing did not work out. He inquired if we had pondered the Turner house anymore. We said, yes, actually. He said that if we were at all interested, he would put our name in the paperwork with an exclusionary clause stating that we would not have to go through a realtor to purchase said home. And, oh yeah, the house was going on the market the next day.

Seemingly fortuitous timing, eh? Well, I don't think chance was involved in this.
The very next morning we ran into him again, at a gas station of all places. He told us that his wife was at the house that very moment cleaning it and that she would let us in.
So, we went and looked. It was like a brand new house.
The very next day, we started talking price. Two days later we put earnest money down. Now we just wait for the final papers to be processed.

Take a peek at what the house looked like one year ago.

Yeah, Wow. U.G.L.Y.

Take a peek at what it looks like now...

WHAT?!

Amazing.

It was built in 1947 and they were able to keep and restore the original wood floors.

It has five bedrooms and one bonus room. A nice and open kitchen which we've already bought an island for.

The bonus room.

They had to take the house all the way down to the studs, so it is essentially like a brand new house inside. As much as we love to move into a house and put our own fingerprint on it, this fact, that it is totally move-in ready, makes my heart happy.

There are still things I don't love about it, the yard for instance. The linoleum. Being on a corner. No formal dining area. But I can live with those things. I can live with the fact that we can afford this house and that it was meant for us.

Did I get my dream house? No, not yet. But there is still time, should the Lord tarry. We could build in three years if we wanted to. In all this time of waiting, we've learned how to save well. Something we were never good at before. Buying a parcel of land outright is now not an impossibility.

There's a line in a song that says, "So we never got to Paris and found the cafe of our dreams, but our table holds a whole world of memories. No, we never went to Venice and strolled the streets alone, but we built our worlds together and we got the best of both."

If we never get the house of our dreams, at least we have each other and we have a place to

DWELL.

~christa jean

Changing Faces

2011-04-12T15:23:00.000-07:00

Bright, shiny faces!
Here are some random pics of the kiddos, in no particular order. Just for fun!

We've been going for weekly trail walks, rain or shine. ~JoyFull!~ ~Patient~ ~Loving~

{Isn't her new do cute? Of course, this was a few months ago and I'm just now posting about it.} Who knew an umbrella would bring such cheer?! ~Soft and cuddly~
{He wears a patch on his strong eye two hours a day in order to strengthen his weak eye. He loves that there is glitter on them. So fashionable, for a pirate!}

Loveyas!

~christajean

Double Trouble

2011-03-27T15:52:00.000-07:00

Twins have been on my mind. Seriously.

I am already very poochy belly and only 17 weeks.
I started feeling this baby (or babies) move at 8 weeks.
I know a few people who have had twins in the last year or so.

And then my midwife said the words, "You are measuring 4 weeks bigger than you should be. I'd like to schedule you for an ultrasound."

Soooooo, last Wednesday I get my 32 oz. of water ready and the kiddos and I head to the library. I was told that I needed to have all my water guzzled by 11:30.
Fine. No prob.

I'm just dinkin' around the library and happen to look at the clock... 11:35! Oh no! I had only finished 8 oz.! I quickly chugged all but 4 oz. (just couldn't do it!) and finished my water by 11:4o- ish.

I dropped the kids off at my sis-in-law's for some cousin time and headed up to the hospital to meet Carter. Of course, the first question they ask is, "Did you drink your water?" to which I promptly reply, "Yes."
They didn't ask me if I had finished it by 11:30, so, no lying on my part!

We head back to the exam room and I lie down on the table, praying that the gel is warm. Cold gel is NO fun on a nice, warm belly.

The ultrasound technician (super sweet gal) squeezes warm gel on my belly and smiles. She measures the head first and finds that, indeed baby is 17 weeks.
Note, that I said baby. There is only one.

For a brief second I felt sad for this... what an adventure twins would've been! But then reality check hits me and I remember that I already have four. God knows what I can handle and I thank Him.

Why was I measuring so big? Not sure, but my theory is that my uterus just goes into "done this drill before" and so, pops out the day I realize I'm pregnant.

Back at the ultrasound, Tech Gal says that baby probably won't cooperate because of it's position and we'd have to see the sex a different time. Sigh.
I think she could tell we were disappointed, so she had me get up, relieve my bladder (THANK you!), and move around a bit. I climbed back on the table and she took some face pictures. Sweet, little face that looks like a skeleton.

She jiggled baby's legs a bit and then, voila!
We saw it.

The third leg.

That's right, friends. Eliot get's himself a baby bro!

I had to sign a waiver stating that I understand this is NOT a guarantee and that said Tech Gal could have been mistaken about the sex. You know, just in case I think I wanna sue her if she was wrong. Puhleeeeease. Who does that? Well, someone has or I wouldn't have had to sign it.

Speaking of Eliot... didn't I just have him?
I feel like it. I still recall that day and all that surrounded my home birth like it was last month. And now I'm going through with this again?!!!!
I crack me up!

Ohhhhh my.
Well, if you don't mind a few more "Pregnancy Blatherings" then feel free to read along.

~christa jean
p.s. Once I troubleshoot why my phone isn't syncing with my laptop, I'll post pics of the infamous belly.

I Am Loving This!

2011-03-01T22:41:00.000-08:00

Here are a couple pics from The Nester of her random plate wall. The arrow is pointing out the out-of-place oval plate she saw after she took the picture.
Uh, I might have missed that.I will probably do something akin to this in my next home. I like to copy people who are brilliant (and frugal) decorators. I have no shame about this, for we all know that imitation is the greatest form of flattery!

And here she reveals her tips on how to hang them plates on the wall. Thank you, Nester! Especially from those us who get stuck in symmetrical, you've inspired us!

What are you inspired by when it comes to decor?

~christa jean

p.s. I can only seem to get the before pic to fit, but you can imagine what it looks like when she moves the oval plate to the bottom left... perfecto!

Would you fall to pieces in the High Country?

2011-02-16T22:58:00.000-08:00

I know I would.
Let me give you a peek at some glory. The pictures below are just a hint of what I see weekly here in my little part of the world. If you ask me how many pictures of pink mountains I have, I won't tell you. ;-D Because, for some reason, I keep taking pictures of them!
The following four shots all happened in the same day. I was meeting a friend for an early coffee/chat/prayer date and saw this...

Look real close (above), up in the right hand corner is the sliver moon again.

My favourites. And it all happened in seconds.

These are mere glimpses of what is to come.

He is good and He shows us daily, if we are awake enough to open our eyes.

Keep our eyes wide open, Lord.

~christa jean

Never forgotten.

2011-02-07T16:15:00.000-08:00

Today I remember my niece Lydia.

She went to be with Jesus one year ago and changed all of our lives.

Loss drives you to your knees. And often in that desperate state, your heart opens a little wider and you begin to see Him for who He truly is. He is not aloof. He does not love babies so much that He takes them from us. He weeps at our sadness. He sees that we live in a world full of darkness and death and so He sends us His light.

"The thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy. I have come that they may have LIFE and have it more abundantly."

{John 10:10}

So we, like fragile seedlings, reach for the light. As we trust Him, fear Him, seek Him, love Him, our roots go down deep and become strong and we are able to withstand all.

~ You will never be forgotten ~

February 7th, 2010

Dreaming of Decor...

2011-01-30T14:48:00.001-08:00

My hubby and I recently went to our favourite beach for a few days. One of the reasons we love the quaint town of Cannon Beach is that it holds so many fond memories for us. Another reason is a sweet shop named "Sesame and Lilies" which never disappoints. There are rooms full of beautiful and unique household decor and furniture and just when you thought you had got to the last room, you'd find another nook full of pretties. Here are a few of the items that inspired me...

{This armoir was filled with things old and new and I loved the distressed look of it.}

{Here's me taking in the serene surroundings.
Of course, I would have a pillow with birds on it in my clutches.}

{A closer view of the ottoman covered in fabric inspired by vintage french flour sacks.}

{I want.}

{I want this too, minus the crows.}

{This was the coolest table in the whole shop and I know I can make monogrammed stools like that! Give me some fabric paint, a template, and voila!}

{A closer view of the table legs.}

{LOVE the mirror.}

{I even liked this shabby farm table.

Pair it with some wing back chairs and maybe a glitzy chandelier.

Luscious.}

When the decorating itch takes over me, I am compelled to do something, anything. So, I help decorate our church. Here is what we put up after Christmas. Thank you, IKEA (and Carter). If you look closely you can see curly, white twigs between each panel.

{ With lights!}

{Homemade lighted panel in the stairwell. The light fixtures are on my list to "help" with too.}

{The far wall. That black border around the sign? Duct tape. Yup. We have a budget ya know! And, I did not do the lettering by hand without a little cheating with an overhead projector.}

{Oh, what I could have done with this beauty with some paint and glaze! But they wanted $150 for it. WHATEVER!}

{And here's me again, strolling down the lane...

Okay, just dreaming. ;-D}

~christajean

Big Baby Boy

2011-01-21T14:50:00.000-08:00

Here's a shout out to my little, big man for turning 2 this month!

What would we do without the world's sweetest little boy in our house? He's a funny little character. If he sees a drawer or cupboard open, he will come by and close it for you, even while you're trying to get something out of it. Or maybe it's the fridge that he tries to close you into. He's efficient that way. He is very neat and cleans up after himself. He sings himself to sleep with "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" every night and wakes up humming some little tune every morning.

{Moustaches are all the rage. Especially if they are chocolate.}

{He says "I yuw yoo" to us day and night.}

{He loves to wear royal garments. No matter that they have purple hearts on them.

He's paired it nicely with a camo shirt.}

{When daddy comes near, he knows it's tickle time!}

{He's very regular and goes on the toilet after breakfast every morning.

And that's one less icky smell for me to deal with.}

{I LOVE this. He "reads" daily.}

{I'm FREE to be ME!!!}

{He loves to be cuddled, loves to be touched,

which is most definitely his language of love.}

{My two hunks!}

I'm sure he would love to stay being THE baby in our house, but such is not meant to be. Come August, he'll be a big brother to one more little bundle of joy.

YUP. And baby makes seven!

~christa jean

I'll bring the caramels, you bring the floss.

2010-12-23T10:16:00.000-08:00

Does anyone remember these chewy chunks of gold? I made them exactly two years ago to pass out to friends and neighbors. I decided to try them again, this time with confidence!

recipe from Mica's blog (her blog is always so spunky!) if you would like to have a go at 'em too. They will not disappoint, I can guarantee it! See my husband's face below? Caramels make him happy.

Here is the

This is us celebrating 11 years together at Cannon Beach.

It was snowing!

God bless us everyone!

Love to all,

~christa jean

The Opposition.

2010-12-22T15:57:00.000-08:00

Have you ever noticed that as soon as you make up your mind to change something or implement a new, good habit, there seems to be an opposing force?

Take my last post...
I seem to have such passion and zeal for teaching my children to listen to the Lord's promptings in every day life, but when I actually try to sit down with them to "Pray & Listen" the first 10 minutes seem fraught with distraction. Someone's whining, someone's jumping around like a jumping bean, and someone's got a stinky 'tude (wait, that may have been me). I start scolding, then we have to pray harder. It would just be easier to not do it.

But, when we decide to push through the fog and distraction, knowing that there WILL be opposition, then we get beautiful glimpses of insights from the Lord.

My oldest wrote out what she was "seeing" from the Lord, here it is, exactly how she wrote it:
"I feel like our whole life is a big knot and we keep trying to unravel it and we keep trying and trying without the Lord and it only gets thighter and thighter and we finely ask for the Lord and He helps us and our life goes in a strate line."

My middle daughter saw a vision in her mind's eye of a big gate with lots of people trapped behind it and the Holy Spirit came and opened the gate and they were freed.

My youngest daughter usually has a difficult time paying attention to what we are doing when we are trying to listen with our hearts, but she does get dreams. She dreamt recently that there was a bad house with people in it that were being fed through a hole in a door. We were all in a good house that flew up to the sky with a parachute. The bad house called out to us and said, "I'm good now!" and then it had a family.

I love the thread that runs through all these pictures. To me the thread looks like freedom from bondage.

Back to the opposition. We have a very real opponent and unless we become aware of his schemes, tactics, strategies, we will be more easily defeated.

There are times when I really struggle to hear anything from the Lord. Here are a few things that seem to happen in me head:
1. To do lists floating in and out of thoughts.
2. Doubts that I can even hear, or clearly, at that.
3. I'm hearin' nuttin' honey.

The first on the list can be dealt with by "Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;" {2 Cor. 10:5}

The second on the list can be dealt with similarily, but with one more step of recognizing who is the father of lies. When I use the Word against a lie, I come out from under it's influence. "The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep recognize his voice and come to him. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. After he has gathered his own flock, he walks ahead of them, and they follow him because they know his voice. They won’t follow a stranger; they will run from him because they don’t know his voice.” {John 10:3-5}
I desire that last line to be true of me.

Now the third is a tricky one. When I am not hearing anything, I pause to evaluate. "Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." {Ps. 139:23-24}

The amazing thing is usually I know right away what is hindering me from hearing. The Holy Spirit is sweet like that. Whether it be unbelief or unforgiveness...

Unforgiveness. Ooooooh, that's a nasty beast. I have lots to tell you about that stinker, but let's wait til January, kay?!

Here is a superb article that I have read and re-read and highlighted and underlined and re-read again. It's not really about unforgiveness, but it is about purposing to pursue our enemies. I will leave you with my favourite quote from it:

"I will tell you a solemn truth: we either pursue our enemies or our enemies will pursue us."

{Francis Frangipane}

There is no neutral ground.

~christa jean

Taste and See.

2010-11-15T22:53:00.000-08:00

We've been busy! Remember in my last post (over a month ago, sheesh!) I told you that I might tell you what we've been doing the last few months?

Here's a small snapshot:
We were asked in July to prayerfully consider becoming leaders of the Children's Ministry at our church. We did prayerfully consider it, for, like, a minute. We knew right away that this was what Jesus, the lover of children, wanted us to do.

We prayed for direction. We liked the curriculum that was being used, but we were feeling nudges to go in a different direction.

In August we hosted our first informational meeting and had record numbers attending.
In September we held our first training meeting for teachers and assistants with record numbers attending.
In October we kicked off our new "program" (for lack of a better word) with a song and a dance (literally) and much fanfare.

Does it sound like I'm boasting? I hope not! But have you ever known that you were in the right place at the right time? That you were born for a certain something? Well, this is just a small piece of that certain "something" and definitely an opportunity that is for us for such a time as this. As we stepped forth in obedience, all the pieces began falling into place. He likes to bless us that way when we obey!

The cooooooolest piece of it all was a tiny little children's book that revolutionized my thinking. As I read through it, I cried and instantly sat down to "practice" some of it's principles.

The book is called "Children, Can You Hear Me?" by Brad Jersak. It is, in essence, a guidebook for kids to learn how to hear His voice daily. It has become a guidebook for me as well. The phrase that struck me the most, was this, "Children hear the Lord easier than anyone else. Virtually the only block that I encounter in them is their parents' own unbelief." Oof, ouch.

Here are some snippets I captured from the description:
* Children, Can You Hear Me? trains kids to practice God's presence in their lives.
* Imagine raising an entire generation that hears God's voice every day!

I love that last line. I want that to be true for my children. I want them to hunger and thirst for righteousness. I want them to need to hear from their Creator, Saviour, Healer, Counselor every day. If they catch a glimpse of Him now at this young age, they will never want to turn away. As they begin to taste and see that the Lord is good and that He cares about every detail of their lives, then they will get a genuine knowledge of who He is. He is real. He is LIVING. He is not a dead or dead-beat God.

The following is a portion of one of my blog posts from our ministry website...

"You are the light of the world. You are children of light.

'For all of creation has been eagerly awaiting the day

when God will reveal who His children really are.'

{Romans 8:19}

The time is now.

Whether you are a child by age or a child at heart, you are a child created by God. Created to know Him. To know Him fully and to make Him fully known. How do we get to know our God? We communicate with Him, just as we would a dear, dear friend.

Friend says: 'How are you today?'
We reply: 'Well, ... ' and tell Friend all of our struggles, our hopes, our worries, our dreams.
Friend listens. Friend loves. Friend encourages.
Now it's our turn.
We say: 'And how are you doing, Friend?'
And He replies...
And we listen.

His words to us are life.

We believe God is calling all of us "kids" to be children of His Word.

WE DESIRE: To know the written Word deep in our hearts (it is mighty powerful, ya know!), through weekly memorization.
To know the spoken Word deep in our hearts (it is our lifeline!) by listening to His voice every day.

I know it is one of your greatest desires to see your children walking in His truth. How do we make that desire real? By helping them see that HE IS REAL! He cares about every little detail of their lives! Doesn't He know the number of hairs on their heads?!

His words to us are food.

'Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good

Blessed is the man that trusts in Him.'

{Psalm 34:8}

When our children get a genuine taste of a genuine friendship with Him, they will never hunger for anything else.

Let us daily seek together.Don't forget our challenge to you...Please seriously consider finding one evening a week that you gather with your family and pray, worship, and listen together.

The time is now.

All creation has been waiting for the revealing of the true sons and daughters of God.

It's time for a revolution.

You are the light of the world."

Let me tell you, we are putting this into practice in our family and it is changing us. When your children begin to see visions and pray scripture and dream dreams, then you know that He is on the move. We've also implemented a "Pray & Listen" time in our church kids classrooms. He is not silent, we were just not listening!

I could go on and on about what we've been seeing, but it's almost midnight so, I'll save that for another post. I don't want to be a grump in the morning!

I pray that you would be inspired today.

Speak, Lord, for Your servant is listening...

~christa jean

The seasons change and so do we.

2010-10-13T15:09:00.000-07:00

If you haven't totally given up on me yet, and still come peeking by to see where I've gone, I thank you! Maybe I'll try to summarize what my life has consisted of in the last two months... or just leave you guessing, ha ha ha. ;-D

I'm gonna try to ease back in, real slow-like, starting with this light and fluffy post!

Do you receive the Pottery Barn catalogue? I do! I hardly ever shop there, and I don't always LOVE their style, but I do draw inspiration from their pages. Especially whenst flipping the pages whilst sipping a cup of tea.

I took this picture (flip to pages 8-9 in the online catalogue) and tried to re-create it for our own table.

Well, all my beautiful apothecary jars are packed away still, but...

Here is our version...

This is a super fun project to do with the kiddos! We gathered up as many pretty and unique leaves and acorns and pinecones and moss and... you get the point, that we could find. Then rounded up lots of random shaped jars and candle votives (and even some mini juice glasses) and anything else that looked intriguing!

Then we used a simple glue stick to affix the leaves to the jars. When lit, they really glow! The only down side is that the leaves crinkle up and dry out with all that heat.

Sweet and easy and a chance to spend time tying heart strings.

Don't make the mistake of being too perfectionistic about crooked leaves or too much glue and such. That just sucks the joy right out of this project. Believe me, I know.

But thankfully, I caught myself before my kids all ditched me and left me to do it alone!

Happy Fall!

~christa jean

Changing Faces

2010-08-10T20:53:00.000-07:00

Don't they look so intelligent?

{christajean}

p.s. I giggle at baby cuz he looks like a mini version of Ralphie from

"A Christmas Story"!

FREE is a very good price!

2010-07-17T19:08:00.000-07:00

In honor of my sister's birthday, we are doing FREE Shipping over at

HookableDesigns!

I won't tell you how old my sis almost is, but suffice it to say, she's "younger than springtime."

If you know her in real life AND you end up inviting yourself to her house, you and/or your children could end up as "famous" models in our shop too!

Here is KK of LoveWinsPeriod and her darling gals sporting some of the funky new glitter headbands.

We thought it would be fun to throw in an extra incentive for my readers only...

We are offering 20% off ALL jewelry till Friday, July 23rd!

Just type "christasaidso" in the message to seller box when you are checking out. And don't forget the code for the free shipping also...

Your message to seller should look like this:

"FREE SHIPPING SALE" "christasaidso" and then whatever other comments you'd like to add.

Here's a helpful hint: it will seem like you have to pay full price anyway when you go to check out through PayPal, when in truth, you do pay and then we refund the percentage off back to you. We're not trying to trick you. that's just the way etsy is set up.

Thanks for supporting this two mom shop!

~christajean

My Sweet Petite!

2010-07-14T00:31:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday to my precious Olivia!

Deep calls unto deep.

2010-07-13T23:30:00.000-07:00

Where have I been?!!!!

My goal was to blog at least once a week, not once a month!

I have some decisions before me... I want to take this blog into some deep spiritual matters, but I'm not sure how to proceed. So, I tarry in indecision.

I am not afraid to lose readers (that has already happened by posting so infrequently I'm sure!), I just wonder how to make my heart and thoughts known to the worldwideweb and not incur "those" kind of commenters.

But even that I can handle! I could just turn off the comments, right?!
Wait, maybe that's cheating!

Anyhoo...
That's what's up.

~christajean

You're my beatbox girl!

2010-06-05T22:10:00.000-07:00

This is what I get to listen to all.the.time.

And I LOVE it!

She is so creative! She figures out new beats and sounds daily. America's Got Talent, here we come!

Hahahaha. NOT!

Most of all, I love watching her with her baby brother. They are such chums. She would give her life for him.

Aren't they cuuuuuuute!

~ christa jean

And the winner is...

2010-05-28T09:30:00.000-07:00

Hicaboo!!!

Thanks to all you loverly people for participating!

The countdown has already begun till the next giveaway... you could be the next winner!

~ christa jean

Open for business!

2010-05-21T13:57:00.000-07:00

UPDATE! The contest will be open until Thursday at midnight just to let a few more people join in. (I know you want to!) The winner will be announced Friday morning!

See that little red button? If you click there you'll be instantly transported to what's soon to become one of your favourite shops on Etsy! In our shop you will find accessories that are whimsical and daring, sweet and dainty, romantic and vintage.

Here we are! My sis and I and we're having fun creating beautiful things!

Take a little peek at some of the items...

This necklace was hard for me to part with... it reminds me of spring in the tropics.

Lovely and feminine, this hair comb will make you feel pretty!

Super sweet bobbi pin with sparkle!

Check out this tiara! And doesn't my sis look like an elven princess?!

Now for the fun part! To celebrate our Grand Opening, let's do a giveaway!!!

The prize: "I'll Fly Away" earrings made from vintage rhinestone posts, silver tone birdies and dazzling cubic zirconia drops.

How to win it: Pop on over to our shop and come back to tell us which one is your favourite item. You know, stroke our ego a bit! Leave a comment about your fave and you are entered to win! Don't forget, you don't need to have a Google account to comment, just be Anonymous... but be sure to leave your name!

We will announce the winner Monday evening.

{Just had to show off our cute business cards!}

"I'll Fly Away"

Here is a close-up of the cz's, they are super sparkly in person!

Thank you for supporting this mini two-mom shop!

~christa jean

Sunshine, Lollipops, and Rainbows

2010-05-12T15:11:00.000-07:00

This little girl is made of those things!

She has the sunshiniest dimples. She craves lollipops. She gets super excited about pretty things like rainbows and tutus and PINK!

She also has a super stubborn side. I decided long ago that I would be more stubborn, and often that causes conflict for this little one. But it's all apart of the learning. I do not want her to grow up to be an out-of-control, self-serving adult so we work diligently to train up this child in the way she should go. God help us!

I wonder at what God has in store for her.

Often I will find her just sitting by the cd player engrossed in some Jesus music. Often I hear her singing herself to sleep, words that are sweet and full of life. Often I see her standing in front of a mirror speaking to "everybody" like she's in front of an audience.

She dances will full abandon, arms raised to the sky.

She cares deeply when someone has gotten hurt and she will nurse them and pray for them. Funny, just as I typed that, I recalled that her absolute favourite book used to be "Nurse Nancy".

And so I pray for her daily. That she would truly become the woman God planned for her to be. That rebellion and self-centeredness would not be her master. That I would be the mother I need to be. That she would know how deeply she is loved.

Happy 4th Birthday to my Joy Joy!

~christajean

On the lookout...

2010-05-12T15:00:00.000-07:00

I recently went down to the storage area where my dresser is kept, to get a swimsuit out. To my surprise, I couldn't open any of the drawers! The large television that was resting on top had warped the drawers in such a way that it was impossible to even squeeze my hand in to snatch something out.

With a little hubby help, we got the drawers working, but the dresser needs to be dumped.

I wasn't too sad. If you will remember back with me, I got this dresser for free!

Do you remember that I said I had BIG plans for it? I did.

I was going to paint a really cool design on the front of it and then dress it up with glass knobs. Or do something like this...

Or this:

{click here to see this whole room...

super cute!}

Oh well, I guess I'll just have to hunt for a new dresser! Aww, shucks!

I love the thrill of the hunt! And I've been inspired by two sweet decorators whom I just happen to know in person, Rachel and Leah! Check out their dresser re-dos!

I had my own dresser redo that was so very rewarding, although the dresser could use some drawer liners that smell loverly! And it's still in storage. Sniff.

There's one thing I must do before the dresser hunt commences...

Get a house.

;-D

~christa jean

Boys will be boys!

2010-05-09T10:18:00.000-07:00

Whoever said that baby boys and girls are really just the same, that it's all in how we treat them as they grow up, must've been smokin' somethin'.
Their premise was this: if we pamper and pretty our little girls, of course, they will grow up to be dainty and feminine. If we rough and tumble with our little boys, of course, they will grow up to be tough and manly.
Now, if we would just treat them each exactly the same, little girls wouldn't grow up thinking that they have to be mommies and little boys won't feel badly if they have to be the "stay-at-home Mr. Mom".

Can I just laugh out loud right now?! Puhleeeeze!

I'm laughing, but really sad at the degradation, the gradual wearing down of our God-given identities by the feminist-sexist agenda. My job, as a stay-at-home-loving-wife-and-homeschooling-mommy is looked upon as a degrading position, something that is beneath me and my rights as a woman. Do I dare to ask the question... ? What grown-up child would really, truly say he/she was thankful that their mother put them in day care and went off to flourish in her career? Not many, I think. This is not to put down those mothers who feel they must work full-time (Are you really sure? Pray about it hard! There may be another way! Trust me, I know!) or single mothers who indeed must work. I'm talking about those who choose to drop their babies and toddlers off at some daycare because they need to feel fulfilled and validated in the work force. "I am Woman, hear me roar!" As their babies are crying.

Okay, hopping off my soap box now.
Was that my first rant? Cool! I must be feeling feisty today! I'm usually such an agreeable gal! ;-D

I would like to prove a point, that intrinsic in each male or female's nature are attributes that the other does not possess.

Take this scenario for example: two of my girls were working hard at tickling me and as soon as I said, "No! Stop!" through my tears, baby boy comes scooting over quickly and gets in between them and me. Something forcible came out of his mouth that sounded kinda like, "Don ta!" (probably translated "Don't touch!") and he tried to push them away. Sound like a protective instinct to you? Sure does to me!

Here is the next scenario to prove my point:
I was working on a project when I heard baby boy awaken from his nap. I brought him down and sat him next to where I was working. The following pictures demonstrate what I witnessed said baby boy do, without any prompting from me.

He acted as if he knew how to use tools all along!

He's so thrilled with himself!

He is verrrrry meticulous.

And he has the cutest cheeks EVER!

Give it the good ol' taste test, of course.

This baby boy will carry around a small pencil and a silly lid for an hour and be perfectly content. When given the choice between a cool car or a Q-tip, he will pick up the Q-tip first and then try to figure out a way to get it into the car. I love watching his mental capacities expand as he becomes who he was made to be.

Intrinsic in each child is a gift of skill and talent as well; a love for something so unique only they could love doing it. It is one of our jobs as parents to see it and encourage them to flourish in it. When your eyes are opened and you finally catch a tiny glimpse of this glorious blueprint created in each child, you can't help but marvel at the Glorious Creator. No primordial soup could have designed this. It is indeed marvelous!

I am beginning to see...

This is one of the many reasons I love my job.

My two absolute favourite men!

Sweetness personified!

I pray for every mother today that:

"the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give to you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him, the eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that you may know what is the hope of His calling..."

{Ephesians 1:17-18a}

May we know the hope of our calling as we guide each child entrusted into our care into their callings. Let us lead them to spread their wings and fly into that bright horizon.

Even if that bright horizon means being a lovey, stay-at-homey, type of mommy.

~christa jean

Pretty Little Birdies

2010-04-20T23:52:00.000-07:00

I haven't done a decorating post in a loooooooong while... thought it was about time to lighten things up around here!

What do ya do when you can't decorate your house (because you don't have one)?
You decorate other people's houses! Or your church!

Here is a peek at a project I've been working on:

I saw these outdoor tiles in a Crate & Barrel catalogue and was smitten, but not willing to pay the price of $50 for the set. So, I decided to try my hand at painting and see what would happen! Hey, as long as I'm not trying to sell the imitations, it's alright, right?
Gee, I hope so.

I heart birdies in a big way! I would even own one, but would probably be disowned by my husband if I did. I even tamed a baby parakeet when I was younger!

Okay, back to the project.
I love the green used in the above set, but it just wouldn't do on a sage green wall (which is what I have to work with), so I opted for a purple tone (which is another color in the room).

Here are my pre-birdie canvases...

It's hard to see, but there is a rose glitter glaze over the top of the purple to mute it a bit.

And here are my canvases, all pretty like, with silver birdies!

Don't think I'm "all that" yet! I did have to look at the picture quite a bit and draw it with a pencil first. I was worried that my birds would look like mutants and my twigs like spaghetti.

Mister curious thinks he's helping.

Pretty little thangs!

I only spent $16 on the canvases and $4 on the paint. Overall, I like these better anyway. Shhh, don't tell Crate & Barrel.

Did I mention that I love birds?

I'll show y'all the finished room, well, when it's finished!

~christajean

A Cup Overflowing.

2010-03-31T20:37:00.000-07:00

I made it my goal at the start of this year to spend more of myself on loving my girls. I purposed in my heart to do this; a quasi "resolution" you could say. I needed a practical way to make this habit real, not just a hope. So, I resolved to take one night a week and have "lie down time" with each one of my girls individually. I'm happy to say, that for the last 3 months I have not missed one time!

It goes like this:

On Monday nights I endeavor to get each girl into bed by 7:30, this giving me about 30 minutes to spend with each one and still time to spend with hubby. Then, in no particular order, I will lie with them and sing, talk, pray, tickle, or do whatever their little hearts desire. When I first started, I decided 15 minutes would be do-able, but I found that this small amount of time would fly too quickly by.

Each girl favors a different action. The youngest always wants me to tell her a story about herself, but promptly butts in and commandeers the story. In her story, she usually ends up wearing a pink swimsuit and eating elaborate feasts featuring cotton candy and peanut butter pretzels. My middle girl would be perfectly content if I just tickled and rubbed her back the.whole.time. And sang to her. And prayed for her to not have any bad dreams. My oldest daughter prefers for me to tell her stories about my childhood or family or, best of all, daddy and mommy's courtship days! She is a true romantic.

I have made some very important realizations in the last 3 months.
The main one is this: My girls desperately need my love.
And not just for 30 minutes, once a week.

The second realization is this: The more I practice giving love, the more natural it feels.
This may sound silly to some, but for me, this has been a real struggle. Especially giving physical love and affirmation. If you'll remember with me to a post long ago, I wrote about the cup that our children bring to us each day to fill... What am I filling their cups with? I do not always take the time that I need to, to purposefully love. But, this is one struggle that I will overcome. I will not allow myself to stay this way! Thankfully, I have a Helper.

Monday night has become the favourite night of the week. In fact, it is always on their minds. It is actually quite comical with the younger girls, who ask me every night if it is Monday night.

What I have especially loved about these times is that I am getting a deeper understanding of how each of them best receives love. I am getting a glimpse into their hearts. I can see more clearly now that my oldest daughter really thrives on touch, affirmation, and time. My middle girlie also needs touch, morning, noon, and night. My baby girl just wants me... she says that to me daily, "Mommy, I want you!" Okay, you've got me!

Sometimes, you just go through the day living in the same house, but not really living together. It was obvious to me this Monday night that this was the case and my girls really needed me. I lay with each girl for a long time. I needed to re-connect with each one and tie some heart strings again. I saved my oldest for last, and when I finally got to her, my heart almost broke. She was bawling for fear that I had forgotten her. I affirmed my love for her. We snuggled. I sang her song to her. She cried some more. I asked her if she knew I loved her? She said "yes", but I still felt compelled to say that I know I don't always show it well.
I told a funny story, then I asked her what some of her dreams were. I meant 'hopes for the future' but she proceeded to recount to me a handful of dreams that she'd had, all very detailed and interesting. I clarified what I meant by "dreams" and what she said humbled me so. She said she wanted to be a great and loving mommy like I was, have four children like I had, and marry a good husband like I did {in that order ;-D}. I just about cried. It was so touching.

She also said she wanted her husband to have blue eyes and that she was going to write down in her notebook everything she wanted her husband to be like.
People, she's seven!
I don't say that because I'm upset that she's thinking about marriage so soon, I am actually thrilled that already she can see the blessing of love and peace within a marriage kissed by God. She desires it too!

I decided that I would ask her one last thing, though I hesitated for fear of the answer. I asked her if she had any bad memories that involved me... she answered that she couldn't remember anything. Relief and gratitude welled up within. I have prayed that prayer as much as I have worried about it ~ that my daughters would not remember me in my "mean mom" days. Instead, the "kind mom" days would cancel out the past.

A nagging voice tries to tell me that she's only saying that or that she'll remember it all when she's older... but I will not accept the shame that comes from that voice.
I am so deeply grateful for grace.
"There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus..." {Romans 8:1}
"Behold, the old has passed away, all things are made new."

~christajean

Always Clear

2010-03-31T20:08:00.000-07:00

I received the most adorable little postcard the other day from a dear, dear friend.

I think getting mail is my most favourite thing ever {hint, hint ;-D}!

{sweet and delicate}

Here is what it said:

"There is singing up in Heaven
Such as we have never known,
Where the angels sing the praises
Of the Lamb upon the throne.
Their sweet harps are ever tuneful,
And their voices always clear,
O that we might be more like them,
While we serve the Master here."

Beautiful.

Great poems have been born in the midst of loss.

I have never seen poetry fly from my fingers like it has of late.
Hopefully I can finish some of them and post them here.

~christajean

p.s. I couldn't get the picture of the postcard to enlarge for some reason... but it's one of the many sweet designs from "Belle and Boo".

When at last we see His face,
All our pain will be erased.

Faith for a child.

2010-02-20T15:22:00.000-08:00

In one moment, your life can change forever.
From one phone call, life takes a turn that you did not expect.

Little did I know, when I wrote the post "It is well," that tragedy was just around the corner for my family.

My emotions still run deep concerning the events of the last month, but I will not keep them inside much longer. I will let them out, with the hope that, in the saying of it, hope will spring up in others.

Each person in my family has a different version to tell, each from a different vantage point. Here are the events that unfolded from my point of view.

I had not been inside for 10 minutes when I got the call. "Your sister is in the hospital. There is no heartbeat."
My heart paused for a moment as the weight of those words descended upon me.

The baby!

We had just returned to Washington from an exciting weekend with over 4,000 youth in Portland. In a flash, that passion was almost to be snuffed out.

My sister called and all we could do was cry through the phone to one another. There were no words. I said I would come back down to Portland the next day to stand beside her.

That night, as I fell asleep, I knew I would dream about the baby.
Sure enough, I did. In my dream I saw a bird lying on the ground. The bird was picked up and it turned into a tiny baby that was purple. "The baby is dead. " were the words spoken over the baby, but then I saw the baby yawn. "Look at the baby!" I said. I held the baby in my hands, it was tiny. The baby began to move and I put the baby to my breast to feed it. "The baby is alive!" I exclaimed.

I awoke from the dream and did not know what to think of it. I decided to just dismiss it; my dreams seem to usually be more symbolic than prophetic anyway. But I secretly wanted to hope that it would come true.

Every action I took that day seemed to be in slow motion. Each step dragging, yet hurtling me forward toward a death I did not want to face.

The two and a half hour drive back down to Portland gave me time to think and pray. I let the words of great hymns that have traveled down through the ages wash over me. Words like,
"You are my hiding place, You always fill my heart with songs of deliverance whenever I feel afraid... I will trust in You, I will trust in You. Let the weak say 'I am strong' in the strength of the Lord." and "When peace like a river attendeth my way, when sorrows like sea billows roll... It is well." and "Great is Thy faithfulness, Oh God, my Father. There is no shadow of turning with Thee... "
In that space of time in the car, I wrestled with my Lord. I pleaded with Him to remove this cup of suffering from before my sister, she has known it too well already. How can they endure it?!
I also wrestled with an overwhelming desire to believe for a miracle, but, then again, I didn't want to be disappointed either.

As I neared the hospital, I was informed that there was a room full of people praying next to their room. They were praying in faith that the baby would be brought back to life! In that instant, something rose up in me, an excitement that I've never felt before. Well then, YES! let's believe!

I timidly entered the room, still unsure of what I would find. But the energy in that room was electric. I went to my sister's side and held her hand. She was not distraught, she was full of hope, full of faith! My demeanor changed. I remembered the dream and wondered if I should tell her? Or would that just make things worse?

I told her. Why not?! I believed, without a doubt, that the miracle working hand of God, which raised many from the dead, would be seen in that hospital room! So did she.

Baby Lydia was born and was very dead. Yet, in spite of what we saw, we still believed. I even believed that God was use me as He did Elisha in the story of the Shunnamite woman's son {2 Kings 4}, so I breathed into the breathless mouth.

No breath ever came.

We prayed until we knew it was time to go home.

The most heart-wrenching moment came as I walked down the corridor beside my sister's wheelchair. It was so final in that moment. It was the end of a much-longed-for life. My sister wept and I felt her agony. Grief had begun.

Grief has it's place in our lives, although it is not a sought-after companion. My thoughts turn to the character "Much-Afraid" who was given two companions on her journey to find True Love: "Sorrow" and "Suffering" were to be her guides. I could not understand what the significance of those guides were when I read "Hinds' Feet on High Places" so long ago. I do now. I believe that sorrow and suffering will be turned to Grace and Glory. In my life. In my sister's life. In my family's life.

I had a moment of pure clarity the day my sister came home from the hospital. I saw how Lydia's birth allowed a truer and deeper faith to be birthed in me; a faith that's tender shoots must be sheltered and nurtured for it's roots to go down deep.

But the enemy does not tarry long and usually comes at the most vulnerable moments. I quickly saw how the enemy of my soul would love to stomp out that new life in me.

All the way back home to Washington, I wrestled with the thoughts and doubts that bombarded me. Thoughts that said, " Where was your God?" and "Your God must not really be good." and "I guess you don't really know this God of yours." and "It seems that the case for atheism is even stronger now." God's character really came under attack in the subsequent days that followed. It became almost impossible for me to even sing... the very thing I was made to do, I struggled to do.

I was disappointed and underwhelmed by what seemed to be His lack of action. Instead of planning a baby shower, we were now planning a funeral.

I felt like such a dark cloud of confusion descended upon me. As we traveled back to Portland for the memorial service, I could be of no comfort to the one who needed it most. I was still so disappointed in my Lord.

We watched as Lydia's ashes were sprinkled on a garden plot. It was awful to see a baby reduced to a tiny bag of ash. But she was poured out onto soil and watered with tears and someday that soil will bear fruit and nourish many souls.

How does one go back to living? Each smile, each laugh feels like a betrayal to the sadness for the one who has been lost. While everyone else goes back to their routines, my sister is left with empty arms.

The cloud of darkness did not dissipate as we returned yet again to Washington. I felt as if I were in a daze. Then, through the haze, came a piercing light. So unexpected and so needed. I had opened my Bible to look for a story and there, leaping from the page were these words: "See, I have set before you this day, life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both you and your descendants may live; that you may love the Lord your God, that you may obey His voice and that you may cling to Him, for He is your life and the length of your days..." {Isaiah 30:19-20}

I knew then that I had a choice. It was quite simple really; I either choose to trust Him or I turn and be swallowed up by that yawning mouth of death. The death of my faith as the bitterness and unbelief overcome me.

I chose Life.

What do you hold on to when your worst fears seem to be coming true? When innocence is torn from your grasp? You cling to Him.

It makes me tremble to remember the pure and passionate faith that rose up in me amidst the fear of disappointment. Even so, there may be some who read this and shrug at our seeming "foolishness". I suppose I would rather be considered "foolish" in the eyes of men than foolish in the eyes of God. I would rather believe for a miracle that defies "reality", than be reserved and dead inside. In the words of author Jack Deere, "Most of my life I've made the mistake of believing God for too little. For the rest of my life, if I have to make a mistake, it's going to be believing God for too much."

It is true, the miracle did not come for us this time. I don't totally understand why. It was not the outcome that I desperately desired it to be. But, there is one thing I don't have to wonder about: where Lydia is. Oh, how I envy her sometimes! She is with the One I love! She is basking in His radiance! There is no darkness of pain there.

Death, where is thy sting!

We will be there with you soon, baby girl. It seems hard to wait now, but I know that when we get there, our time here in the Shadowlands will seem like just a breath.

"'And God will wipe every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.' Then He who sat on the throne said, 'Behold, I make all things new...' {Revelation 21:4-6}

Watch this video to be moved as I have been:

If you struggle with believing that God is good, I would suggest you read Randy Alcorn's book, "If God is Good... "

If you struggle with believing miracles can happen today, I would suggest you read this article, "Is Healing For Today?"

If you still haven't read the classic, "Hinds' Feet on High Places", DO IT!!! You will not regret it!

I will say one final thing. I have been so inspired by the strength my sister has shown through this trial. Even as I pleaded with God to let this test pass from them, I knew that they would endure and come out the other side victorious! When others would turn away to the darkness of despair and bitterness, they would cling to Him, and the story, that would touch many lives, would flow from their lips. I know my sister meant the words, "God is so good... He's so good to me" as she sang them at her baby's funeral. Though those words cut her, she surrendered. She is being redefined by the fire, and it will not devour her.

~christajean

When, at last, we see His face,
All of our pain will be erased.

Life.

2010-02-02T22:03:00.000-08:00

I will forever be Pro-Baby.

No eloquent or winning argument could ever sway me to the other side.

I know what life is. I have seen it at it's tiniest stage.

When we learned that our 4th baby had died and had died many weeks before, it became imperative to get that baby out of my body. So, I began taking herbal tinctures, strong, nasty tasting brews that I had to chase down with juice. A few days passed, nothing. The clock was ticking and the longer that baby stayed inside, the higher my chances for infection were.

I remember wishing, longing for the baby to just come out. I would dream of getting to see it, hold it, wrap it in a little towel. That may seem morbid, but the desire burned within me. So much so that any thought of being forced to have a D&C would send me into chills.

Then the dreaded happened.

They told me to watch for a fever... I got one.

I knew deep down that it was just a cold, my daughter had a fever a couple days before, but now there was no choice for me. Everyone was playing it safe. We had to go to the hospital.

In the ER, the doctor told us that the D&C was scheduled for the morning. I asked if we could see the baby. The doc said the "fetus" would look like a gray and pink mass, and the hospital would keep it for testing.

"WHAT?!!" I said!

"I want to see my baby."

I was told that even if the baby was intact inside me, the procedure would tear it up.

So we prayed.

They decided to try misoprostol through the night which would induce labor and possibly allow my body to release the baby. It did bring on contractions but after they subsided, I knew it hadn't worked. The procedure was looming.

That was when I lost it. I had so hoped and prayed to see that little babe, scared though I was to. Now it seemed as though I would just have to let go. Carter and I had some time where we just released the baby. We named it. We prayed. We cried.

I saw myself on the verge of darkness. I could see the depression and despair and knew I could let myself be swallowed by it... but God. He in His mercy led me away from the edge of the pit. Peace enfolded me.

It was midnight when I got up to use the restroom and when I turned around to see, I saw her.

Awe.

Even the doctor (the one in the ER) was in awe. She said she had only seen this happen one other time. The baby was perfect.

We have a BIG God who cares about little people and the little details of our lives!

Why am I telling you all this?

Maybe I'm Johnny Come Lately, but I just learned that misoprostol is used alongside the abortion pill RU-486. And the Planned Parenthood 3 minutes up the street gives both out to girls up to 9 weeks pregnant.

If only they could see what I saw.

In 15 days, I will be joining with thousands of others in praying against abortion.

40 Days for Life is rallying people nationwide to pray beginning February 17th.

We are waging a war here and I am not going to sit idly by! I'll fight on my knees.

I love life! I love the little lives that I get to hold and see grow. I cherish them deeply.

Don't ask me if I'm done having children yet. Maybe I want to counteract, by the tiniest percentage, the 50 million babies that have been aborted.

Lord, forgive us.

~christajean

It is well.

2010-01-26T15:34:00.000-08:00

Tragedy cuts to the core of our soul. It can shake us to our very foundation.
When all that can be shaken is shaken, how do we respond?

I have experienced loss... but not to the magnitude of this fellow.

Meet Horatio Gates Spafford, who penned the famous hymn "It Is Well With My Soul".
The words of his hymn penetrate so deeply when you realize at what cost they flowed from his hand.

Horatio and his wife, Anna, lost their only son to scarlet fever at the young age of four. Just a year later, all his holdings in real estate along the shores of Lake Michigan went up, literally, in flames in the Great Chicago Fire.

Another year later, Horatio was convinced the family needed a holiday, so they traveled to New York and booked passage for England. At the last minute, an unforeseen business affair arose and Horatio sent his wife and four daughters to sea without him, with the intent that he would follow shortly. Nine days later he received a telegram from his wife with these fateful words, "Saved alone."

"On November 2nd, 1873, the 'Ville du Havre' had collided with 'The Loch Earn', an English vessel. It sank in only 12 minutes, claiming the lives of 226 people. Anna Spafford had stood bravely on the deck, with her daughters Annie, Maggie, Bessie and Tanetta clinging desperately to her. Her last memory had been of her baby being torn violently from her arms by the force of the waters. Anna was only saved from the fate of her daughters by a plank which floated beneath her unconscious body and propped her up. When the survivors of the wreck had been rescued, Mrs. Spafford's first reaction was one of complete despair. Then she heard a voice speak to her, 'You were spared for a purpose.' And she immediately recalled the words of a friend, 'It's easy to be grateful and good when you have so much, but take care that you are not a fair-weather friend to God.'"

Upon hearing the terrible news, Horatio Spafford boarded the next ship out of New York to join his bereaved wife. Bertha Spafford (the fifth daughter of Horatio and Anna, born later) explained that during her father's voyage, the captain of the ship had called him to the bridge. 'A careful reckoning has been made', he said, 'and I believe we are now passing the place where the du Havre was wrecked. The water is three miles deep.' Horatio then returned to his cabin and penned the lyrics of his great hymn."

Had he known that his words would comfort countless hearts through the coming years, maybe he would have been a little consoled.
Their story does not end there, they went on to have more children and do great exploits in Jerusalem.

It Is Well With My Soul
When peace like a river, attendeth my way,

When sorrows like sea billows roll;

Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,

It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Refrain:

It is well, with my soul,

It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,

Let this blest assurance control,

That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,

And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!

My sin, not in part but the whole,

Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,

Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live:

If Jordan above me shall roll,

No pang shall be mine, for in death as in life,

Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.

But Lord, 'tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait,

The sky, not the grave, is our goal;

Oh, trump of the angel! Oh, voice of the Lord!

Blessed hope, blessed rest of my soul.

And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,

The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;

The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,

Even so, it is well with my soul.
~Horatio Spafford~

~christajean

Praise.

2010-01-21T23:07:00.000-08:00

How can people praise in the midst of death and destruction?

They know Someone.
That Someone turns sorrow into joy, despair into hope, darkness into light, death into life.
When you know that Someone intimately, your life is never the same and you can sing while chaos happens around you.

Read this touching story about praise in Haiti!

How can a man praise in the dank dark of a cell while the chains cut into his wrist?
He remembers that Someone whose wrists were pierced.
But why does this same man keep proclaiming the Good News about that Someone to the very guards that beat him, with full knowledge that his body will be tortured again? Is he crazy?
No. He counts it all joy to suffer for Him.

There have been many men like this (just read the book of Acts!), but one in particular named Richard Wurmbrand, has touched my heart. His book Tortured For Christ is a book everyone ought read!
Go here to receive a free copy of it.

These people inspire my faith to go deeper, my soul to be stronger, and my voice to sing louder.

PRAISE!

"I will bless the Lord at all times;

His praise shall continually be in my mouth.

My soul shall make it's boast in the Lord;

The humble shall hear it and be glad.

Oh, magnify the Lord with me,

And let us exalt His name together!"

~Psalm 34:1-3~

~christajean

Loverboy

2010-01-14T22:49:00.000-08:00

"...the days slipped by like golden beads on the necklace of the year."

~Anne of Green Gables~

I still can hardly believe it.

Can you?

Wasn't I just complaining about heartburn

and exploding hips

and crushed ice cravings?

My little man is not so little anymore.

*sniff*

Oh, how I love him so!

Parting is such sweet sorrow.

2009-09-11T17:34:00.000-07:00

Alas, my friends, I must say "Adieu" to you.

And to this blog for a time.

It may be a long time.

I am crying over here because of it, but it must be done.

I stress out when I think about writing.

I stress out when I think about how little I have been writing.

I stress out when I sit down to write and then I end up writing about how little I have been writing!

I really do love to write - it's just that I can't do it during this season of my life.

Believe me, I have lots to say about my life right now, but. I. just. can't.

I really wanted to keep up on it.

I hoped it would be my connection with some of my dears.

I really have worried that I will be forgotten once I stop... but that is just a silly fear, I know.

So, goodbye... for now.

Thank you all for your comments, love, support, encouragement, virtual hugs. ;-D

I know in my heart that I will be back someday!

~christa jean

Lovely card design by "Orange Beautiful".

Less is not more.

2009-09-02T22:04:00.000-07:00

Golly gee, I really did not intend to fall off the edge of the blog world.
Is my blog doomed to fade away into nothingness?!!!

NO!

This is such a strange time of transition in my life and I can't seem to find the time to waste hours on the computer like I used to!
But, I have been working up a juicy post for a bit now and will unveil it soon.
It's not a continuation of my story though, sorry. I've lost my momentum on that one.

As I go, I leave you with my newest observation...

I now know why little tiny baby men who suck on boobies and play with mommy's hair grow up to be big men who love boobs and long hair.

:-D

~christa jean

I'm Still Alive...

2009-08-13T22:45:00.000-07:00

If you were wondering. ;-D

Isn't this lovely of me? I've had some crazy moments.

I just wanted to pop in to say "Hey!" I'm sorry it's taken me this long to say something, anything!

I've missed you.
I've missed lots of things.

Some things I miss about Oregon:

~ My own bed
~ Being able to walk about in my undergarments
~ Someone else pumping my gas
~ My family
~ My friends

Some things I love about Washington:

~ Praying a lot
~ In-laws who pray for us a lot
~ Newness
~ People who are excited to see us and get to know us
~ All the trees

Some fun and not-so-fun moments (you be the judge of which were which):

~ Getting to see cool critters like starfish, spider crabs, and jellyfish out on Harstine Island.
~ The whole shopping cart flipping over and pinning Joy to the ground.
~ Me almost getting lost while driving.
~ Me getting all gussied up again for a new driver's license pic only to hate it once more.
~ Filling up the hot tub with cold water on the really hot days.
~ Roasting s'mores and looking out at the city from our backyard.
~ Not being able to find my Homeschool curriculum box that I carefully and specifically marked to come to the house and that I added a bunch of cool new supplies to.

Okay, that last one, I just about threw a tantrum about. Ahhhhh, a lesson in patience and flexibility I see!

Talk soon!

~christa jean

The Move.

2009-07-14T22:47:00.000-07:00

It all started one day when my hot drummer husband was out mowing the lawn. He had been out of work for a few months and was wondering what was next for him in life. Mowing the lawn must be a great time for thinking deep thoughts, because this is not the first time he has come inside and said to me, "While mowing the lawn... ".
The thought popped into his head, "I wonder if we'll end up moving to Washington."

"Did that really just come into my head? Crazy." he thought. "Well, if it's supposed to happen, I won't stop it and You'd have to convince my wife, God."
He forgot about it.

About a month later, while visiting his family in Washington, my sister-in-law said aloud the question that was on all their minds... "So, when are you guys moving up?"

My head whipped up and I laughed. In all the years we've been married, we would have never, I mean NEVER considered it

seriously. I probably just laughed out of nervousness, but the thought wouldn't leave my mind.

I have to admit, that in the beginning, as we began to truly ponder the possibility, I got rather excited. It had a been a rough year. Maybe I was excited because it would be my chance to run away. Start over. Clean slate.

You can't ever really run from the issues inside of you though.

After taking a month to think and talk and pray and fast, we believed that yes, indeedy, we should move. Finally, some direction, some answers! But then there was the waiting... and more waiting... and more waiting. Waiting for a job. Waiting for our house to sell. Waiting for something, anything to work the way we thought it should.

And with the waiting came the uncertainty.
It began in me and spread to him.
The longer it took for nothing to happen, the more doubtful I became. It sure didn't seem like doors were opening smoothly for us to glide on through.
Maybe we were wrong.

It's one thing to voice a concern, a hesitation... a husband and wife should be able to talk things out, looking at all the pros and cons, right? It's a totally different thing to voice doubts again and again, when you once were sure and your husband was sure and now you're making him unsure and anxious! I think there was a little bit of resentment that had snuck in also. Uh oh! Bad News Bears, for sure! I began to get huffy and resistant and well, you know that word... rhymes with itchy.

You could easily excuse my mood and say that I had good reason to act that way, my family is all here in town. Here is all I've ever known! Poor me.
But I know a little something (I'd better! After 10 years married!)... being content makes for a much more happy home than being contentious.

So, I prayed.
The dream came not long after I asked for help.
I saw my husband carrying me and running down green grassy hills and we were laughing together, a lot. It was a picture of joy and love and contentment and peace.
And I knew what it meant.

I decided to make a choice. I chose to allow my husband to carry me in this decision to move, believing, that in that place of being carried, I would find my joy and peace.
I did not just lay down like a doormat. I did not become a Stepford Wives freak. I know the word "submission" has awful connotations like that... no, I just made a choice to change my heart. Really! What else was I gonna do? Stay here with my parents?!

It was shortly after that, on a rare day when we had time to just sit and talk and pray together that Carter said out loud, "God, I just need You to tell me for certain right now what we are supposed to do!" Instantly, into his thoughts came the reference Deuteronomy 2:2. Sound familiar? Nope. Ha Ha. We had to look it up too.
This is what it said... still gives me goose bumps.

"Then God said,

'You've been going around in circles in these hills long enough,

go north.'"

Gee, could You be any clearer?

I know now that if we had moved right after our decision to do so(last fall), if our house had sold and he had got a job and everything had fallen into place, I would not have been ready.

Maybe I would have been a brat for a really long time. Little eyes are watching and I'm so glad I learned to let go.

Could we be wrong? Sure, but I'm not going to worry about it. I know He makes all things work out for those who love Him.

I am responsible to keep my husband's heart and that's what I aim to do.

I still kinda hope we'll be back. ;-D

~christa jean

P.S. Here I am blogging when I should be packing. I think I'm gonna have to leave you for a couple of weeks until all the mayhem settles down. I'll be back!

"Bringer of Peace"

2009-07-13T22:47:00.000-07:00

That is the meaning of this little one's name...

She can sometimes be Miss Contrary, but she is oh-so-sweet.

She is "Sweet Petite" and "Squeaky the Kid" and she loves to love.

I love you,

~ Olivia ~

Happy 5th Birthday!

Has it been half a year already?!!

2009-07-08T14:21:00.000-07:00

My my my, how time flies.
My little man is 6 months old now and I'm still shaking my head.
Sigh.

The many faces of Eliot...

I couldn't resist!

~christa jean

Hear Ye, Hear Ye!

2009-07-05T23:07:00.000-07:00

I hearby proclaim

that all the "followers" of

~ christa jean ~

are hereby disbanded

in a forthright manner!

Okay, so, I have to tell you that I lost 1 "follower" after my majorly intense post. Oh My! Now, who really knows if it coincided with that post or was just a random thing, but it made me worry. Don't laugh! Don't you remember back in High School when you wanted to be popular and make everyone like you and not be upset with you ever? I do!

When I originally saw the "Follow Me" option, I thought, "Well, that seems rather silly... "
But I clicked "Follow" on the blogs that I liked to let them know "Hey, I like you!"
I also liked that it put all the blogs I was "following" on the front page of my Google Reader page. Easy as pie!

Then I got to thinking that I too should add that "gadget" to my blog, just for fun, ya know. And then people actually started "following". Totally Cool!

What is it about women? Why is it that now when I visit a blog and I see 369 followers, my 15 pales in comparison? You know what, when I really think about it, I DON'T want 3 hundred followers reading about me and my life and my dirt. Maybe someday I'll write a book and people can read that, but here and now, I'm just fine with a handful. I don't like the feeling that I need to have more followers, that's just plain silliness!

All that blathering to say, I appreciate you, my faithful friends!

But "Follow Me" no more.
You can still read and comment, of course! I won't be sad about that.

~christa jean

I'm still in shock...

2009-06-30T22:07:00.000-07:00

Awestruck and amazed, I am (cue Yoda's chuckle).

Do you remember me telling you about the executive chair that retails new for $1500?

Do you remember that we only spent 15 dollars on it? Actually, we spent $10 on the chair and $3 on some shoe polish.

Here is a picture of her...

I decided this chair was a her because of her graceful lines, her supple leather, her comforting touch. It even looks as if she is curtsying. She is wearing upholstery tack jewelry all along her front and up her sides. She is one classy lady chair.

The first time you get a taste of true quality craftsmanship, you wish you could ditch the cheap chairs in an instant. We were so tempted to keep this chair, but we resisted.

So, ya wanna know what we sold her for? I know you do.

$250. Two hundred and fifty big ones.

It felt so wrong (when I think of how much we spent), but oh, so right!

That money was supposed to go into our "Emergency Fund", but unfortunately, we had some emergencies come up! I guess I should be saying fortunately we had that money. And fortunately, I have a grateful heart now, after my initial stinky "tude".

~christa jean

The Tower.

2009-06-27T15:58:00.000-07:00

Thank you to all who voted on my poll.

I already knew in my heart that I would continue unveiling my story (if you're new here, click on "My Story" and start at the beginning) I was just majorly hemming and hawing and procrastinating. But I know that it is time.

It is time to step out from behind the facade of "good" and never retreat there again.

When I look back on the annals of time in what is called "Christa's Life", I believe the pinnacle of my pride came during my middle sister's wedding. My 18 month old daughter was in the wedding as the flower girl. I was about 6 months pregnant (that was fun trying to fit into a bridesmaid dress!) and the plan was that the delightful and sweet little flower girl of mine would walk up the aisle and then stand by me... for the whole service. People said it couldn't be done, but remember that I told you she was well-behaved? Very well-behaved. We had practiced coming to mommy, staying by mommy, and holding mommy's hand from the time she could hobble on her two chubby legs. This I highly recommend! But only when it's coupled with hugs and smiles and patience and grace, not scowls and displeasure and harshness as they are learning to comply.

Delightful she was! During the ceremony she held my hand, looked around, smiled at people and was only slightly wiggly as she picked the flowers off of her garland. At one point I decided to pick her up because she had begun flinging her flowers around, I'm sure people just giggled. Was I one proud Momma! I was thrilled that my wonderful Mommy skills were being shown off before vast numbers of onlookers.

I remember the sense of pride I felt in my accomplishment when I heard someone comment that Gracie should be the poster child for our church.

And then...

My dear, delightful toddler began doing things that I did not like. She began disobeying in ways that I hadn't encountered before, seemingly ignoring my instruction, not in defiant ways with tantrums, but in almost calculated ways as if she didn't care anymore about pleasing me with obedience. At least, that is how it felt to me. I was losing my grasp, my hold on her was slipping and I was beginning to feel that control had shifted in ways I did not like.

And then, just like that Tower of old, my pride came crashing down and so did I.

I began to get increasingly more angry. My anger began to turn to rage.

Now, I'm sure every mother could say that at one time or another they have gotten quite irritated at a child and squeezed that little arm a bit tighter than they wanted to. The sorrow and guilt from a small moment of lapse in self-control is shared by many mothers. This is not that.

I will not go into too much detail, but I will share one memory.
First, let me tell you adamantly that I was not mentally disturbed in such a way that I would have harmed my child. But I was finding out that there were some things broken inside me.

I have one vivid memory from those early moments of my journey to the dark pit that is hard to recount but I will. I had given my daughter an instruction that she was extra slow to cooperate with and so in my anger over this, I emphasized my command to "GO!" with a push from my foot on her behind. I can still see it in my head. Her little body stumbling and falling into my closet. The darkness that was in me was enveloping her, I felt. It still makes me sick to think about it, but remember that I'm telling y'all this because I am not that person anymore.

Deep breath.
I can't wait to get to the good parts!
Okay, back to it.

My angry cycles were awful. I would get angry, lash out, then feel so distraught and depressed and angry at myself for being angry and then I would get angry again. The darkness growing in my mind was, well, mind boggling. I could not see through the shame and confusion. Add to that, I was highly involved in Mommy groups where I would share advice and "wisdom" with other moms who may have thought I was a fabulous mother. Oh, the agony of living a double life and feeling trapped in it.

And that is how "being good" betrayed me. I had believed in "being good", believed that it would keep me safe, but I soon found out that it was merely a facade and Pride was behind it. It was a mask. That mask was crumbling and yet, I struggled to hold on to the pieces, because I didn't want anyone to see.

Whew! I just have to say that after typing all of the above last night, I had to desist and go rest my head. When my head hit the pillow, it was as if all the old demons decided to try to torment me again... accusation, condemnation, shame... bombarding my thoughts. "You ARE still that person." my thoughts shouted at me. I literally had to pray out loud numerous times before I could sleep in peace.
If you don't understand what I'm talking about, have never given much credence to a "spirit world", then you will be in for a ride. And, no, I'm not some medium or spiritist, I am just aware. Wary, is more like it!
I'm not afraid to tell anyone anymore.

"A light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not mastered it."

Like I said, I can't wait to get to the good parts.
~christa jean
P.S. If this post changes your opinion of me, well... um... GOOD!

Let's Jam! Domesticality Part 2

2009-06-23T16:48:00.000-07:00

Well, the jam making photos are not cooperating, but here's the scoop (mmm, fresh jam on a scoop of ice cream) and I'll update with photos later!

We met the berry picking troop at the Heikes farm with our grubby clothes on.
I'll have you know that I've never ever picked berries before.
I know, so deprived.

So, I'm picturing myself with my baby strapped on, squatting in the row filling my container with plump berries like those talented, hard-working mothers you see in other countries. When I got to the rows and started to bend down, I almost fell on my face! I suppose if I were to try to carry a pitcher full of water on my head, I would also fall over, or the pitcher would. I trekked back to the car and put the tiny man in the stroller.

I thought berry picking was surprisingly easy, but then I only picked for 45 minutes. The farm lady was nice, there was a portalet and place for washing hands, and they had free containers to use. And the berries were cheap at only one dollar a pound! I think I literally picked on one side of a row, only moving about 3 feet and got myself 3 pounds of strawberries. Boy, were they good. We were allowed to eat as many as we wanted... the 3 year old carried around a box, putting a berry in and promptly taking it out to eat it.

We headed back to TLC's house to make our tasty spread.
We cheated again and made "No Cook" jam where you just mash the berries, add some sugar and pectin and let it set up for 30 minutes. Easy Peasy! The recipe is on the back of the packet of pectin. We left out some of the sugar because we remembered from last year that it was waaaaaaay too sweet.

For those of us who have never ever actually canned one thing in their life (sad), this is a fabulous way to fake it!

The next day, we ate our jam all.day.long. Seriously.
We had it on toast in the morning. We had it in pbj&banana wraps for lunch. We had it on our yogurt for snack. Wow, so yummy! I wanted to pour it into my mouth, it was so good. We've already gone through one jar.

Then we put it on handmade ice cream. Don't I sound so domestic and wonderful? Hahahaha, NOT! This was another cheater recipe. Did you know that you can make ice cream in a plastic baggy with 3 ingredients, some ice and some rock salt? And if you don't have rock salt, like I didn't, you can make that too!

We've sure been having fun... but with these fun memories comes a small sadness.
I can't help thinking that our fun moments here in this town are nearing their end. "This may be the last time we ______. " flits in and out of my thoughts throughout my day. Our house has finally sold to a solid buyer and we only have about a month before we head north. I have more to say on that subject... soon.

This pic doesn't match the post really, but it matched my wistful mood.

On that happy note, go make some jam!

~christa jean

Domestic Edjumacation

2009-06-19T19:57:00.000-07:00

We've been quite busy! Our days have been full of domestic adventures, luckily with few foibles.

My gal pal KK pressured me into making yogurt with her. No, not really, she suggested it and I said, "Sure, if you come over and do the whole thing while I stand by and pretend I'm helping and then post about it on my blog so it seems like I'm some Domestic Diva. And I'll feed you lunch." Not really again, but that's kind of what happened. She is by far the Domestic Diva. Just walk into her pantry!

Ready to ROCK this thang called homemade yogurt!

We got the idea and recipe from a super neat lady named "Frugal Girl". That is her super power, no doubt about it!

The following is our take on yogurt making...

Must wear the proper yogurt-making attire.

I had jars, KK had a bowl with a lid. You choose!

You are supposed to boil the jars and lids for 10 min... of course, my pot lid didn't fit over the jars so we made a lid of foil. Cool beans!

Isn't she lovely as she pours the milk so white and frothy?

Here is the pan of milk cooling in the sink (for complete instructions see Frugal Girl's recipe) and let me just say that KK was the Guardian of the Thermometer, only she had this thermometer that, by the end of the day, I was most desirous of. Do you think I should ask for a thermometer for my birthday?

This is the yogurt we chose to add in. Mmmm, creamy.

Fill 'em up...

...and throw them in a cooler partially filled with hot water for at least 3 hours.

Dagnabit! I wished I had taken a picture of the finished product! I added blueberries to it and finished the bowl in less than a minute. I'm so excited to make more of this, especially with my baby boy coming into the food eating stage. I will probably make it for him using only organic milk though, maybe even farm fresh! Like I said, check out the original recipe for more complete instructions. It really was do-able!

The best part of the day?

~ friends ~

~ christa jean

P.S. Hopefully tomorrow I can post the pics from what we made today with more friends! It is reminiscent of this!

Your jaw will drop...

2009-06-15T22:04:00.000-07:00

...when I tell you that we found this Ethan Allen armchair at the Goodwill Outlet for 15 bucks.

It had a couple of very slight stains on it that we cleaned out, and then...
We sold it on craigslist for $85!!!

Then we found this little vintage beauty and spent a whole 5 dollars on it.

All it needed was a wipe down and some Sharpie marker run over some scratches, and then...
We sold it for 50 smackers!!!

Today, we scored a total of 60 buckaroos for this chair...

That we only spent 5 dollars and a baby wipe on!!!

Give a whoop and a holler with me!!! "Oh yeah, uh huh, oh yeah, woop woop!"
It is such a thrill when we turn someone's junk into someone else's treasure and we profit from it! These are just a few examples of things we've turned around. It's a really fun hobby, I tell ya!

We are stashing all this extra away in our emergency fund, following the wisdom of Dave Ramsey, who suggests that everyone have $1,000 cash in a safe place for when a need arises.

I hope this inspires you to keep your eyes peeled for a great deal!

~christa jean

P.S. We spent $15 on a gorgeous leather executive chair that retails for $1500 brand new! Will let you know what we get for it!

Cheap and Chunky and... aaaaaack! I can't think of a third adjective that begins with Ch!

2009-06-10T21:43:00.000-07:00

I was thinking the other day about how much I love a good guacamole.

Not the store bought guacamole that you squeeze out of a plastic baggie.
Not the powdered seasonings that you mix into chopped up avocado.

No sirree. I like me some fresh, hand chopped, hand mashed, chunky guacamole with a big bowl of chips.

I like to make it myself and pretend that I'm a darn good cook.

HA! That's funny.

I'll let you in on a little secret of mine that's helping me save some pennies (well, hopefully more than just a few pennies)...

Trader Joe's Guacamole Kit..... $2.99

I like that price! And it's all inclusive.

~ 2 avocados

~ 2-3 garlic cloves

~ 2-3 shallots

~ 1 tomato

~ 1 pepper

~ 1 lime

If I were to try to buy all of those items seperately to make up a batch, it would cost me more than $2.99. I don't know how much more, but, I just know, ya know? Okay, I guess I'll make sure I'm telling the truth when next I'm at the market.

The only thing I would add would be a smidge of cilantro. Oh, and I never use the whole pepper ~ muey caliente'!

Just a "fluff" post.

I feel a deep sense of pride knowing this post has touched you deeply. Deep.

Wholly Guacamole's site features ideas like this!

Expose`

2009-06-04T21:34:00.000-07:00

Why did I do this to myself?

Y'all, I have been avoiding this blog for the last week as if it's the Black Plague.

I have even started dreading sitting down at the computer.

I was getting all geared up (and even kinda excited in a weird sorta way) to dive into some personal stuff, dig up some dirt, expose some weaknesses... so, why this squeamishness all of a sudden?
Am I still slighty ashamed? Could be.
Am I slightly skeered? It's possible.

And yet, there is still this urge in me to blog about it because, well, I have found freedom from those nasty skeletons that kept trying to live in my closet.

I am pondering what my next step should be.

If you would do me a favor and vote on my poll (see that HUGE thing!) about this issue, I would appreciate it.

I'm not saying that my mind could be swayed by the majority's rule, but I want to know it anyway.

Did I tell you that I miss my hair? I know, totally random.
See how long and lustrous it was?

I may or may not have been picking my nose. Thanks a lot hubby!!!

Now my hair is shorter by 4 inches and curly and sassy but still shorter and well, I can't stop thinking that I have "Mom Hair" now. Oh well, such is life.

~christa jean

Who can it be?

2009-05-30T11:21:00.000-07:00

Wow! What happened to 10 am!!!
It's a beautiful, sunny Saturday and my head is in the clouds.
That, and I rushed out at 8 am this morning to have a hair boo boo fixed... have I told you before that I'm silly that way?

Anyhoo...
You seven have been waiting so patiently, and now for the reveal!

I had my trusty assistant (my 6 year old) draw a number out of the hat and she drew number...

7 !!!!!!!!!

Seven is a great number! Seven is the number of God. Seven is the day my baby boy was born.

Seven is Anonymous (aka Tawnie). Yay!!!

Thanks for playing and for looking at my sister's shop and for you sweet person who bought something too. You guys are the best!