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Thursday, March 21, 2013

What Would Carter Do?

Lately, I've found myself given over to lazy whims and desires.

Take tonight.

My husband is gone at rehearsal, I am alone with kids. The dishes are piled up, the laundry is piled up. What's a girl to do?

Avoid them like the plague.

Then, I got to thinking about my sweet husband and how servant-hearted he is. He does my dishes every night, people. And, if I'm upstairs folding laundry, he comes and helps me do that after the dishes are done.

There I was, standing in the kitchen and I thought, "What would Carter do?"

He would do the next thing.

I'd like to say that I did the next best thing and did the dishes to bless him.

But, honestly, and here's my grand excuse, I just wanted to crawl up in my bed after dealing with throw-up all afternoon, the stench of stomach acid still lingering in my nostrils.

I did however empty all the downstairs garbages, and sweep the floors. Hey, it was something!

Now, I'm resting in my bed, click-clacking away, while he is downstairs clanging pots and pans.

Ahhhhhh, tis a delightful sound! I'll thank him later. ;-)

My husband is someone I admire whole-heartedly. He encourages me, protects me (sometimes from my negative self-talk), spurs me on, loves me on bad hair days, never speaks a harsh word to me, he is always the first one to apologize, and makes me laugh daily. He is a man after God's own heart, he seeks Christ daily, he is a good daddy. I kinda like this guy God granted me. Even more, I kinda want to be like him.

{hubba hubba}

Words always have a way of toying with me. They stick there, in the forefront of my mind, like that proverbial piece of spinach lodged in the teeth. And I chew on them.

The following words have been chewed on quite a bit lately.

“The difference between an admirer and a follower still remains,
no matter where you are.

The admirer never makes any true sacrifices.
He always plays it safe.

Though in words, phrases, songs, he is inexhaustible about how highly he prizes Christ,

he renounces nothing, gives up nothing,
will not reconstruct his life, will not be what he admires,

and will not let his life express what it is he supposedly admires.”

{Soren Kierkegaard}

I think about how I know God is nudging me to reconstruct my life (get up earlier, exercise consistently, eat well, teach my children scripture) and how I keep shirking from it.

I think about what I know I need to give up (as I'm here munching on potato chips), not in some legalistic "deny myself everything pleasurable" insanity, but because, I know to Whom I belong, and I want closer, ever closer to His throne, and further, ever further from the trappings of this world.

How many times have I thanked and praised God for His awesomeness on Sunday morning, only to speak harshly and rudely to the awesome little child-miracles surrounding me that very night?

This is not a beat myself down session, it is a "Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." {Psalm 139:23-24}

I no longer want to be an admirer. Only a follower.

My name means "Follower of Christ."

Thank you, Dad and Mom for the foresight to name me thus.

I aim to live it.

~ christa jean ~

P.S. Happy Birthday to our Angel baby, our sponsor child. She is ONE today! We found out that she is not an orphan, but her family is so poor they can hardly feed her. She has three older siblings, a set of four year old twins and a sister who is twelve. I pray for strength for her parents today, and favor. Lord, be the Provider of every need.

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Baby Steppin'

I've fallen off the blog wagon, y'all.

This is my attempt at kicking my batookie back in the saddle again (help me to have discipline, Lord!).

Here's my issue (yes, I have issues! along with using too many exclaimation points when I type! see?!): I have found that if I can't perform or carry out a job/task/idea/discipline ~~perfectly~~ well, I get paralyzed and just do nothing.

Yup.

See those five drawers that need to be organized/decluttered? I don't have the organizational supplies that I REALLY want (durn you Martha Stewart Living Office Supply line at Staples!), and so they just sit there half done or not at all.

See that jewelry business that will not promote itself? I don't have a suitable work space, all my supplies are in bins, and it's a pain to drag it all out, yada, yada, yada, whine, whine, whine.

See those children who need to learn something? How do I get them to conform to the way I want to conduct a school day and stay on track and still have a relatively cleanish home, oh, and then sit down to tea and a history lesson in the afternoon.

See that blog that sits blank for months at a time and only has 37 followers? (I love you my followers! Just stick with me, here!) I have grand ideas about blogging, at the very least once a week, on a certain day, and being a blessing to others (as I social network, ha ha ha).

Some of my issue stems from, I hate to say it...
Comparison.

I see another person's beautifully organized craft space and want...
I see another person's start-up business soar into success and wish...
I see another person's homeschool that seems to run so fluidly and wonder...
I see another person's blog touching thousands of lives and get wistful...

You see, comparison leads me to jealousy and envy and covetousness. Yuck!
Glass half empty anyone?

Now, let's turn this little post into a positive one!

I DO have five drawers and am making do with what supplies I DO have (shuffling it all about) and having fun with it.

I DO have a jewelry business that is currently being molded into something that, I think, hope, pray, will bless His heart more!

I DO have little children who ARE learning. Even if some days, it's just how to be kind and take care of a baby.

I DO have a happy little space on the interwebs, where I can prattle on about whatever I please if I so desire. Maybe someday I'll write a book. But, that day is not today. Whenst "that day" comes, it will be with white couches and nicely manicured nails and grandbabies running amok... on second thought, maybe I'll have white couches in Heaven. Today, is the day that I have babies and diapers and dishes and laundry and snuggles and THIS is the day that the Lord has made for me.

I am baby steppin' into a new season of my life. A season of thankFULLness. A season of giving and not consuming. A season of not taking things personally, or becoming easily offended. A season of seeking Him first. A season of newness. A season in which I desire for all that I am and all that I do, to please Him.

I finished the year 2012 in the first few chapters of an excellently thought provoking book.

I didn't really know how to download and process it all, nor how to apply it to my life.
I can't exactly say that it's changed everything, but I can say that it's changed small things that could very well turn into the big things that change everything.
Here's the proof:

Since the reading of it, I have loaded up bags of clothes and shoes and toys to take to a ministry in town that gives clothes away to those who are in need.
I have handed a man standing on the corner a hot roasted chicken from Costco with some cash (missed two other opportunities to give away food/money, and kicked myself, prayed that I'd notice more).
We've given away lots of money.
My desire to buy, buy, buy has lessened. Not totally disappeared as evidenced by my desire to buy office supplies in Tiffany blue.
Last night, out on date with hubs, he offers to go into Forever 21 with me to take a peek. WHAT?!!! Never before heard of! But, ya know what? I didn't really want to. I have so many clothes and shoes, I could clothe a small village in Africa. Period.

That's progress people!

Speaking of Africa, we have finally decided on the child we want to sponsor! After thinking for years that we would sponsor a child with Compassion International (yet never able to figure out how to budget it in) we decided to sponsor through a ministry that rescues and cares for orphans in Uganda, called Return Ministries International. If you follow me on Instagram (my mini blog), you'll know that my girls were selling jewelry to earn money to sponsor a child. Their dream is becoming reality! They want to go beyond sponsoring and adopt her, bless their hearts. You will want to adopt her too, when you see her little face.

The face of an angel.

{Namaganda Angel will be one year old on March 21st}

One thing I know for certain...

Baby steps are a precursor to walking strong, then running.

Let's do this!

~ christa jean ~

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Gift Guide 2012

Welcome to my 2012 Gift Guide!
If you are planning on doing any shopping this month, please consider supporting handmade!
Speaking of! If you'll scroll down a bit, you'll see that I have items in my shop. Finally! I opened it in January, and there it has sat allllllll year, sadly empty.

My girls have a ~~booming~~ little business of their own on Instagram, all in the hopes that they can help sponsor a child through Compassion International. They are soooo close to having the funds for the first month. I decided I would put some of their earrings in the shop to see what would happen. Then, in January, I will launch a new Spring/Summer line of my own. Wish us success!