Sunday, February 17, 2013

Baby Steppin'

I've fallen off the blog wagon, y'all.

This is my attempt at kicking my batookie back in the saddle again (help me to have discipline, Lord!).

Here's my issue (yes, I have issues! along with using too many exclaimation points when I type! see?!): I have found that if I can't perform or carry out a job/task/idea/discipline perfectly well, I get paralyzed and just do nothing.


See those five drawers that need to be organized/decluttered? I don't have the organizational supplies that I REALLY want (durn you Martha Stewart Living Office Supply line at Staples!), and so they just sit there half done or not at all.

See that jewelry business that will not promote itself? I don't have a suitable work space, all my supplies are in bins, and it's a pain to drag it all out, yada, yada, yada, whine, whine, whine.

See those children who need to learn something? How do I get them to conform to the way I want to conduct a school day and stay on track and still have a relatively cleanish home, oh, and then sit down to tea and a history lesson in the afternoon.

See that blog that sits blank for months at a time and only has 37 followers? (I love you my followers! Just stick with me, here!) I have grand ideas about blogging, at the very least once a week, on a certain day, and being a blessing to others (as I social network, ha ha ha).

Some of my issue stems from, I hate to say it...

I see another person's beautifully organized craft space and want...
I see another person's start-up business soar into success and wish...
I see another person's homeschool that seems to run so fluidly and wonder...
I see another person's blog touching thousands of lives and get wistful...

You see, comparison leads me to jealousy and envy and covetousness. Yuck!
Glass half empty anyone?

Now, let's turn this little post into a positive one!

I DO have five drawers and am making do with what supplies I DO have (shuffling it all about) and having fun with it.

I DO have a jewelry business that is currently being molded into something that, I think, hope, pray, will bless His heart more!

I DO have little children who ARE learning. Even if some days, it's just how to be kind and take care of a baby.

I DO have a happy little space on the interwebs, where I can prattle on about whatever I please if I so desire. Maybe someday I'll write a book. But, that day is not today. Whenst "that day" comes, it will be with white couches and nicely manicured nails and grandbabies running amok... on second thought, maybe I'll have white couches in Heaven. Today, is the day that I have babies and diapers and dishes and laundry and snuggles and THIS is the day that the Lord has made for me.

I am baby steppin' into a new season of my life. A season of thankFULLness. A season of giving and not consuming. A season of not taking things personally, or becoming easily offended. A season of seeking Him first. A season of newness. A season in which I desire for all that I am and all that I do, to please Him.

I finished the year 2012 in the first few chapters of an excellently thought provoking book.

I didn't really know how to download and process it all, nor how to apply it to my life.
I can't exactly say that it's changed everything, but I can say that it's changed small things that could very well turn into the big things that change everything.
Here's the proof:
  • Since the reading of it, I have loaded up bags of clothes and shoes and toys to take to a ministry in town that gives clothes away to those who are in need.
  • I have handed a man standing on the corner a hot roasted chicken from Costco with some cash (missed two other opportunities to give away food/money, and kicked myself, prayed that I'd notice more).
  • We've given away lots of money.
  • My desire to buy, buy, buy has lessened. Not totally disappeared as evidenced by my desire to buy office supplies in Tiffany blue.
  • Last night, out on date with hubs, he offers to go into Forever 21 with me to take a peek. WHAT?!!! Never before heard of! But, ya know what? I didn't really want to. I have so many clothes and shoes, I could clothe a small village in Africa. Period.
That's progress people!

Speaking of Africa, we have finally decided on the child we want to sponsor! After thinking for years that we would sponsor a child with Compassion International (yet never able to figure out how to budget it in) we decided to sponsor through a ministry that rescues and cares for orphans in Uganda, called Return Ministries International. If you follow me on Instagram (my mini blog), you'll know that my girls were selling jewelry to earn money to sponsor a child. Their dream is becoming reality! They want to go beyond sponsoring and adopt her, bless their hearts. You will want to adopt her too, when you see her little face.

The face of an angel.

{Namaganda Angel will be one year old on March 21st}
One thing I know for certain...
Baby steps are a precursor to walking strong, then running.
Let's do this!

~ christa jean ~


Gina said...

Everything you spoke resonated with my soul. There are days I literally get nothing done because of wanting things to turn out perfectly and the fear that they may not stops me dead in my tracks. But Jesus! He is good and he has helped me over come this to a point.

Faith to take baby steps will lead to big ginormous a blind trip to Ethiopia...but he is so faithful with our baby you said our goal is to please him with your everything!
Oh and I too have issues of too many !!!!! Hehe.

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